Olympus Drive Book 3: According to Plan

Chapter 66

Basil

I don't know why 'the fuck do you think you're doing' is a phrase I use so often in my life. But it is. I should probably find a more tactful way of being annoyed with my kids. But it's three am. Three. Fucking. A. M. Oh no wait it's five a.m. Ha. I can't read anymore that's great. Anyway, a run down of what I find my shithead offspring are doing in the band room of the elementary school at five am:

Dara: conducting, I sired a leader not a follower, who thinks that sparkly jeans, a cape, and a helmet, are the proper attire for this

Elena: playing the piano loudly and badly, I can only assume she chose the piano because it matches her outfit, mostly black and from another century

Juno: playing the harp because it's pretty like her she's actually in her pajamas good child

Isa: fusing every single door shut and playing the drums with pieces of metal, fully dressed in a grey hoodie, hood pulled up, and jeans and wearing dark glasses

Gale: running around the room really quickly with a pair of symbols, still wearing the pink button up and khakis my dad paid him to put on this morning

"The fuck do you think you're doing?" I ask, standing in the wreckage of the door I broke in.

"Hi dad!" innocently, all except Gale.

"It is five—fucking—am, there was a murder in this town tonight and Thyme for the first instance ever is actually innocent do you people have any good explanations for what the fuck you're doing here at this time of night?" I ask, folding my arms, "Not you, Gale, you're an angel and we're all thrilled you're here don't bond with your siblings anymore okay?"

"We're just playing," Dara says, shrugging.

"Yeah it's Moulin Rouge," Elena says.

"That was not Moulin Rouge that was like nothing I've ever heard none of you know how to play any of those instruments at all---you were doing brilliantly Gale that's all you do with cymbals---don't do it again though----why the fuck would you be ----Sol put you up to this didn't he?" I ask, tiredly.

"No," they all lie, shaking their heads.

"It is five am. Somebody in this town got murdered. It had better not have been one of us or by one of us. Your mother currently has one of my two bait phones. I am not in a good mood tonight, children," I say, tiredly.

"What?"

"She has a bait phone?"

"Which one?"

"How'd she get it?"

"She held up Gerard at gun point apparently so he gave up a bait phone to save himself—,"

"Have you ever told Gerard about us?" Dara asks.

"Fuck no. I said 'you can live with me rent free and have the best sex of your life if you don't ask questions a lot of weird shit happens just don't question it just move on' he said 'I can do that' and he has, brilliantly, and until daddy finds a new boyfriend who he can sneak in under your mother's nose we're keeping him is that entirely clear?" I ask, coldly, leaning against the wall.

"Ewww," they say, mostly at the 'best sex of your life' part but I finish anyway. They nod slowly at the end.

I glare at them.

"Which bait phone?" Elena asks, nervously.

"Yeah, we need to know."

"We do stuff to those."

"Yeah we play with those a lot, Dad."

"I assume the phone is whichever one you DIDN'T change your mother/aunt's contact info to 'The Evil One'," I say, mostly to Isa, "Since I'm still standing and haven't ripped my throat out, torn my ears off, or whatever new punishment she'll think of."