Forever Alice

Chapter 8

I was waiting for Jasper that night. I had changed in to my cutest lingerie and tied a bow around my hair, Snow White style. I had lit several candles and waited. I sat Indian style on the bed watching the seconds hand on the clock tick by. Thw newborns had practiced foghting all day and they had taken to it easily. Afterwards a group hunt was in order. Carlisle had decided that having the newborns hunt everyday after training helped them stay tame and served as reward for hard work. Carlisle says a lot of things. Jasper was padding down the halls. He had stayed downstairs talking woth Carlisle after the newborns had gone to the Newbie house. I had eaves dropped and they were tallking about how he thought I was depressed. Jasper's hand was on the door knob, twist, click. He walked in.

"Hey Alice," Jasper said not seeing me yet as he closed the door and dumped his jacket on the desk chair. His eyes met mine and I smiled. "Hellooo," he corrected himself. He sat on the edge of the bed.

"Hi," I said pretending not to notice anything different. "How was your day?"

Jasper nodded his head and took off his shoes, "Good. Thhe newborns are taking well to combat training. How was your day?" He asked lounging on the bed next to me.

"Okay, I didn't spend as much time with you as I had planned to in my head," I stated absent-mindedly. "I talked to Tanya today, Jedidiah is the one for her I guess. Laura has this insane gift. I had a meltdown in front of you earlier, I was over at Bella's before that. You know the usual." I shrugged ans he sat up straighter.

"About that meltdown part," Jasper began."I want to help you with whatever is bothering you and causing this depression-bipolar-behavior-thing, but you have to tell me what's bothering you, okay?" His hands rubbed my shoulders. I looked away and he sighed. "Or don't."

"I'm sorry," I whispered. I met his gaze and leaned closer my lips teasingly centimeters from his. I ran a hand through his hair and down his back, lounging it lazily over his shoulder.

"You are truly unpredictable Freaky Little Monster," he murmured and I pressed mylips against his. Jasper laid down on his back and pulled me down on him. I wraooed my right leg around his hip and placed my right hand on the side of his face. His breath was sweet in my mouth and I kissed him urgently, passionatetly because this was the last time we would have together. Jazz growled and ripped off his shirt. I kissed his chest and unbuttoned his pants. He slid them off and I found his lips again. He matched my urgency and passion, but I could tell he was confused. We lay there in our undergarments and I pulled away and just laid on his chest. "What's wrong?" He asked, hugging me to him.

"I just want to remember everything about this," I whispered. I needed to remember every touch, every kiss, every sweet act of love, act of kindness, compliment and him. I memorized his beauty evert detail of him as I replayed the beginning to end of our love, of our story. "Jasper, I only do what I do to protect you."

"I know," Jazz murmured. He kissed my cheek and untied the ribbon in my hair, letting fall down to its spiky natural flow. "Alice, you don't need to protect me, it's my job to protect you-"

I bit my lip and kissed him again and this time we melted into one form. Moving in a dance of longing, sorrow and pasion. The urgency to lovethe other while we still could rushing out. A while later I stopped again and stared at the ceiling. Jasper propped himself up on his elbow and studied me. "Please tell me," he begged. "There is something going on amd I can't stand laying here helpless." I ran my fingers around the contours of his features.

"I just want to remember you even after..." I stopped because I didn't know what was coming next. Carlisle thought we had a chance at heaven, Edward thought we were damned. I just wished for a state of peace where Jasper was safe in my arms forever. That was my heaven. For the first time in a long time I knelt down and prayed. Jasper studied me as I did this. Dear God, I know I haven't exactly had a steady relationship with you and I don't really follow your natural path but I will try the rest of my life to be a good vampire if you just keep Jasper safe. I din't know if I am damned or have a chance at heaven like the humans but I just want Jasper to be safe and well and happy even if that means I am no longer...alive. God if I am gone please take care of him, I want him to find happiness again. He's the most amazing you ever gave me other than salvation amd I know you claim that vmpires are damned but Lord please consider maybe not damning us. I am a dirty awful murderous sinner and I have a few heads on my name but I am sorry please. In Jesus's name I pray. Amen. I stood up and crawled back in to bed.