Fake Park Episode 1: Potholes and Gnomes (South Park)

Anime Club

The old teacher pace in front of the room, ranting, "Froot Loops and Apple Jacks are the same cereal. Apple Jacks just have those gay specks. They are fuckin' Froot loops," the teacher spat passionately, Stan nervously prodded Kyle with the eraser side of his pencil, "Uh... Why Mr. Garrison teaching us about conspiracy theories?" catching the boy whispering to his friend, Mr. Garrison snaps his gaze at the raven, "Care to speak to the whole class," the boy slowly walked to the front of the class, the eyes of the student pierced him, "Every Froot Loop is a different flavor?" he said unsure of his answer, Mr. Garrison pointed towards the door, "Get the fuck out my classroom!" the blue-eyed boy tiptoed closer towards the door, his hand on the door, "Uhh... Where do I go?" the teacher glared at the 10-year-old, before pinching the bridge of his nose, "The nurse's office if you don't get the fuck out of my classroom," the teacher threaten, launching a book at him. The moment Stan's shoes step one foot out of the fourth-grade classroom the bell rings, fourth grade scrambled to get out of the former president's class.

The boy in blue stared at the table where his boyfriend was sitting will Cartman, Jimmy frowned, "A-Ag-again? W-w-what happened?" Craig glared daggers at the table, his grip tightening around his spork, "I. Don't. Know. Maybe one of you would like to confess to pranking Tweek," the boys stopped eating, he shot a glare at everyone at the table, "You remember when Tweek was ranting about gnomes tryin' to rape him. Someone must've thought the bright idea of writing a little story where Tweek was rape by gnomes with me being a gnome is disguise. They then gave him the story,". Butter fidgeted with fingers, a pout on his lips, "W-Well that sure isn't very funny. Who would do such a thing?" Kyle glared at the overweight boy across the cafeteria, before Stan could stop his super best friend Kyle pounced on the boy, "You fuckin' asshole! What's wrong with you?!" he punched Cartman in the face, before he pulled off of him by the boys, "Shit you stupid Jew, what the hell was that for?" he cupped his jaw, massaging the sore area, "You are messing with Tweek!" the boy stared up at the ginger, an eyebrow perked up, "Am not!" Kyle struggled, a murderous glint in his eyes, "Stop lying you fatass! I know you up to this," Cartman frown, Stan sighed, "Again with this Kyle. Enough. You're being ridiculous. He hasn't done anything for weeks. Why would he choose to do it now?" Kyle's face grew red, he growls pointing at the overweight boy, "We saw him staring at us in the window. I know he's up to something. Come on Stan you have to believe me," his emerald eyes plead with the raven, the boy grumbles, "You being paranoid," Kyle frowned not ready to lose this fight, his eyes snapped towards Cartman, "Fatass, why were you staring at you?" the fat boy laughed, flick his nose, "Who wouldn't be staring at that honker?" Kyle saw red, the boys towed the ginger out the lunchroom. 

The fat boy sadly stared at a large amount of food on his tray, rubbing his jaw. He was angry that the only attention he got was when he was blamed for something. Picking up his spork his scooped up a morsel of gravy and mash potatoes, he sighed, "C-Cartman?" the fat boy jumped at the spaz's voice, he glances at the boy his wearing his facade once more, "What do you want?" vemon dripped from his tongue, Tweek was left unaffected at the biting tone, "Ah-I doesn't know. Uh... Too much pressure!" the boy squealed, yanking at his hair. The pity in the boy's eyes made Cartman furious, he shoved the piles of his lunch in the trashcan. He wasn't hungry anymore, the boy remains silent the rest of lunchtime being watched by the table of boys.

Kyle sat in the corner of the hallway, Craig and Stan stood nearby, "Dude your just paranoid," the ginger huffed, no one believe him and were saying it was all in his head, "I'm not. I know Cartman and know what he's capable of," Stan snickered, sliding his back against the wall until he was at his level, "What if you wrong? Maybe isolating him changed him... Y'know for the better. I mean your always trying preach morals, but don't have faith that Cartman can change," a bitter chuckle escape Kyle, shaking his head, "People like Cartman never change. I though we've learned this by now. Like the time he tricked Butters that it was the end of the world just to go to my birthday," Stan frowned, he didn't know why he was trying to find good in monster like Cartman, but can't help trying, "T-that was then," Craig rolled his eyes at the pair, the bell rang signaling that lunch was over, "Okay this is cute and all, but we have bigger problems than if we can trust Cartman or not," Kyle nodded, the boys stood up and proceed to walk to their class, "We need to find who is pulling this prank," Craig fists dug into his blue jacket, nodding, "Yeah and I think I know who can help us find the culprit," Stan raised a brow, "Who? It's probably nearly impossible," Craig shrugged, "We can at least try to catch the bastard,".

At the end of the day trio approach the computer lab, Craig knocked on the door. A girl opened the door, slated eyes narrow at them with suspicion, "What do you guys want?" the boy in blue glanced behind the girl, behind her the anime club huddled to hear the conversation, "We need your expertise," the girl frowned, opening the door a little wider, "What might that be?" the boy gulped, displaying the twisted story to the Asian girl, "Someone is scared my boyfriend with this... This story," his feature wrinkled at the remembrance of the fiction, the girl frown, "This isn't a charity. We do we get from you," the monotone boy hummed, thinking what anime geeks would like, "Ramen," the girl tsked, shutting the door in his face. Kyle glared, his fist pounding on the door, "Come on! What do you girls want?" the door was quick to open, a sadistic grin on her face, "Seeing you in a sailor uniform for a day," heat raised to the ginger's cheeks, disgust coats his feature, "Eww! Sick! I'm not wearing a skirt," Craig shoved his foot in the door before it shut again, he sighed, "We'll do it. Just... Help me make my boyfriend not afraid that I'm going to suck his nose,". 

The girls crowd around a table as the main girl read the story, Kyle glowered at the monotone boy, "Dude, what the fuck?" the boy in blue huffed, pulling his hat further down, "I'll make it up to you. This is for Tweek. I don't want him to scare of me from the rest of our lives," Kyle sighed, giving in, "Kyle it won't be that bad. It just some fabric," his emerald eyes narrow at the raven, Stan shrunk, "Some fabric that won't go to my knees. Dude you just giving Cartman more things to tease me about," Stan sighed, the trio stop talk hearing the girl clear her throat, "Okay we got something by the writer," the boys scooted closer, listening attentively, "Who is it?" the girl rolled her dark eyes, pointing at the paper, "That's impossible, but we do know that the writer is an amateur at smut. They would need access to a printer. And obviously need to know about Tweek's fear of underpants gnomes. So we think they might be in close contact with Tweek," the boys left the computer lab grumbling, they learned absolutely nothing about the culprit. The boys sat on the curb, Craig glared at the school's staff parking lot, "Back to square one I presume," Stan sighed, "Who could it be?"

Cartman heard the front door slam shut as his mother went off to work, he sat on his bed watching as his old friends try to figure out the author. His eyes focus on the ginger growing frustrated, the brunet rubbed his jaw where he was hit, "Ha... At least they spoke to me today," he blinked the wetness from his eyes, painful grin pinned to his face, "Albeit to blame me" he scrub the tears from eyes, a bitter chuckle escaped him, "While attention is attention. Even if it's negative," the overweight boy smiled, admiring the ugly jew with emotion clawing at his heart, "That's all it'll ever be huh... All I'm worth. I'll always be the first one blamed. The first one to get punched in the face," the smile broke, he looked down at his pal tear rolling down his plump cheeks, "I wonder what's it's like... You get friends that stick with you even after a fight. You get nice parents... Ha, two parents that pay attention to you," he roughly dried his tear on his polyester sleeve, he looked up where the ginger once stood. He was gone. Cartman sighed, "I hate you, you stupid Jew. You get everything! Everything I don't have!".