Frost & Fire

Chapter 8 (Abigail)

The days and nights were not my friends as I paced almost constantly. Since taking up the mantle of Queen, I had dropped out of school since I never knew when exactly I would be able to do any work and I wasn't about to waste anyone's time. I had barely talked to anyone and found myself in my lab a lot, just staring at everything I once had so many plans for. Sighing, I looked up at how everything was changing and landed my eyes on my father's prized camaro and took the keys.

"Jarvis, let my father know I'm going out."

"Yes, Mrs Odindottir." I smiled a little, not realizing my name had been changed in the system.

I jumped into the car, opened the garage door and sped off. Music blared in my ears as the top was put down and I swerved from lane to lane, my thoughts engulfing me. Something just didn't feel right and all I could do was sit at home like some wounded dog. I let my tears fall, reaching speeds I knew were not safe for the turns I was taking, but I was in complete control until I made it to my destination.

It was a cliff overlooking the ocean that my father used to bring me to. He had always told me that sometimes our minds could be as calm as the ocean on its best day, and other times it would be fierce with doubts as the waves were crashing on the rocks. I sat while dangling my feet off the edge and just stared out into the unknowing, wishing like hell that I was with Loki. I knew our people needed him, but so did I.

"Abigail?" I jumped a little at the voice, but didn't bother turning my head. I knew the voice all too well. "Abby, what's going on?"

"Everything and nothing." I said softly as my father sat down next to me. "How am I supposed to fill these roles? Just a few years ago I had to ask a teacher to use the bathroom, now I'm not only expected to know who I am, but to know how to lead? I can't even do that because of what they did!"

My father put an arm around me and pulled me into an embrace. "Did I ever tell you what happened when I first found out about you?" I shook my head no, but I couldn't imagine how that had anything to do with what was going on now. "You were already born so I didn't have a chance to be there for any appointments and your mother had already given you my last name, saying she knew for sure it was me that got her pregnant. Neither of us were saints and both in our slut phases.

"She brought you to me with a DNA test. I took it obviously while I was left alone with you. You were so small and so needy." He laughed a little. "I was petrified of you and I had no idea what I was doing. I thought if I could just ignore what was happening it would be best and I wouldn't have to man up. Well, obviously that didn't work out and I got to watch you grow when it was my weekends and soon my weeks. Pep raised you more than I did, and for that I'm still sorry, but that's the point. It's easier to run and continue to not know, but you've never been one to take the easy route and I've always been so proud of you for that.

"So no, you're not going to know what to for a long time, but you're doing your best. It's easier for me to tell you to stay because I'm not the one being torn away from the person I love. I want you to stay because I love you and I don't want to see you hurt, but I know the past few days have been hell on you. Just, please, give it a little more time and I know that Loki will be back soon." He kissed the top of my head and I remembered why this was always my comfort spot.
Through the years, this was the place that my father and I could connect while being secluded. We could talk about anything and then go home like nothing had ever happened and we didn't speak of it again.

He was right, though, and I hated to admit that. My home was wherever I was with Loki and he would be back soon, no matter how long it felt like. I needed to be stronger and be able to use my unit better and less frequently until I could figure something else out.

"Will you help me with my unit until he comes back?"

"Of course."

We sat for a while longer before he left, knowing I still needed more time to sit and think. Which was probably not a good idea right now since all my thoughts did a circle in my mind, making me feel completely lonely again. As the sun set, I stood up and stretched, heading to the car and put it in drive. I took my time to drive home, not looking forward to being alone in bed again.

I took the long way as I used to do when I was avoiding any problems that I just didn't want to deal with. Even before we were married, we almost never were apart and now we were actual worlds apart and I had no idea what was going on where he was. I hated it, but there was nothing I could do unless my father had some new way to communicate between worlds, and I was sure that if he did, he would've shared that information with me.

Once home, I saw my dad working over time on the SCUs. "You could have waited for me."

"It's okay, I think I have it figured out, but to get what we need will be a little difficult."

"Dad...why don't you go be with Pepper? The units will always be here." I said gently, walking over to look at the equations he was working on.

"She's okay and this is important." His voice was distant and I could tell he had been overthinking everything for a few hours at least and since I didn't get a message from Pepper, I assumed he was right. "So, when you originally created these, you only meant for them to be used for a short period of time, not long term. Not only is it shortening, it's just not made for the use you need it to. Plus, it's not made to withstand freezing temperatures."

"So what should I do?"

Before he had a chance to answer, we heard a loud crash outside that normally came from the bifrost opening. Running outside, I saw Loki standing there looking like someone had just punched him in the gut.

"I'll explain later, but for now, go make sure he's okay." My father said, apparently noticing what I could, that something horrible must have happened while he was on Jotunnheim.

"Daddy?" I called, running up to him, placing a hand on his cheek. "Daddy, what happened?"