Pathos [Gay/BL]

Chapter VI

CHAPTER VI: Mamma mia, here we go again!

There was a really uncomfortable silence in the car. Eric was holding his girlfriend's hand with his eyes fixed in the road before him, Summer looking through the window, right beside him. Amy was gazing awkwardly at everything but the inside of the car, her eyes traveling alongside the street. 

Soon after Summer opened the door of the bathroom, I asked Eric to give me a ride home, to which he obviously accepted. Amy joined us when she told us she had no way to go back home without Stella and Summer got in as well since she decided to leave the party if Eric wouldn't be with her.

I scrutinized Eric through the rear-view mirror. His brown hair was kind of brushed back, but its messy nature made it look mussed anyway. He had his jawline kind of tense and his deep honey-brown eyes set on the road, which reflected the light of the car headlights back to his face. Suddenly, his eyes traveled to mine through the rear-view, getting me to look away.

"Is it raining?" Summer asked suddenly as she stared at the little dots of shadow that got glued to the window.

"It's snow," Eric corrected tenderly, looking briefly at his girlfriend.

"Oh my God, yay! I love snow!" she exclaimed, excited.

We first dropped Amy off at her house. She didn't say anything when she got out of the car, only staring at me in the eyes in order to communicate without words. I got the message: we had to talk. The ride to Summer's house was even more uncomfortable now that Amy wasn't beside me. It only took ten minutes, but it seemed like hours. None of us said anything until Summer kissed his boyfriend good-bye and got out of the car.

"Passenger seat?" Eric asked me when his girlfriend shut the door, looking at me through the rear-view to see my response.

"No, I'm fine," I answered, looking away. Eric sighed and started to drive again.

My heart was still pounding fast from the events of the night. I felt my stomach aching when I recalled Stella's watery eyes while she yelled at me. I once felt what she was feeling now and it wasn't easy at all. Noticing how two people you love with your whole heart start hating each other, hurting each other and fall apart hurts. I was still amazed at how good Stella had hidden it. She was hurting really bad and none of us had realized until that moment.

Eric gazed at me once again, his eyes glittering in the dark of the night. He was definitely not attracted to me, I was sure now. It wasn't that big of a deal, though, he was hot and good and sweet, but he was my friend and nothing else. It wasn't going to be hard for me to ignore my attraction to him since it was... that, only an attraction. But in order to achieve that I would have to distance a little bit from him. Just a little.

When he parked his car in his driveway, we stood still for a moment in the dark. He sighed and I mimicked him, staring at him through the rear-view. Then, we got out of the car and looked at each other under the light of the streetlight, snowflakes landing in our skins tenderly. He smiled sadly at me and then talked with a calm voice.

"Are you okay?"

"I think so..." I replied truthfully. He nodded.

"She doesn't hate you. She's your friend. Now get some sleep, okay?" he continued softly.

"Okay, thanks for the ride," I replied.

I sensed he was coming for a hug but I started to walk away with a brief and quiet "Good night, Eric."

Amy and I talked until late in the night on our phones. We argued, then comforted each other, then argued again. We decided that it was time to go to sleep at around 3 a.m., but it wasn't easy for me. I struggled to fall asleep, trying to get some rest, but Stella's face wouldn't stop showing up in the dark. It was 5:32 a.m. when I last checked the time before finally falling asleep.