More than just cake - Lawliet x OC -

Heartbreaker

I'm not sure If I've already used this picture of Matsu in some other chapter, but oh well. It's my favorite picture of him, by far. I love that look on his face. <3 And yeah - Matsuda has like completely hijacked this fic. I don't know what to make of it.

What else? This is a short chapter, just something in between. I hope you like it. 

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January 7th, 2010

Fay knew she was a heartbreaker - and that was putting it nicely. She had been called worse, many times.

There was a reason she had never really had girls as friends. Women didn't like her, in general. Misa had been a nice exception to that rule, but it didn't change the fact.

The fact being, that men easily fell for her, and Fay had been known to have their petty hearts for breakfast. For some reason it didn't make men want her less, but it had always made women hate her guts.

Fay was fully aware that she deserved every mean name she had been called by.

She had never loved anyone but L. All the other guys had been just a distraction. Just a pastime. She wasn't even ashamed to admit that she had used them for her own, selfish needs. Most of them probably hadn't cared, but Fay knew that she had left some of them broken and lonely and desperate.

What did that make her?

And why did it matter now, when it had never mattered to her before?

She knew she was bad news.

Any guy with a half a brain would stay the fuck away from her, and if she had even a half a heart, she would stay celibate for the rest of her days.

And still.

She couldn't resist Matsuda's scent when he leaned closer to give her a kiss. He smelled of her strawberry shower gel, and it made her feel warm and fuzzy and horny at the same time.

He was so tall, she had to tiptoe to be able to kiss him.

No high heels this time, just her old sneakers, her jeans and a hoodie - but he kissed her like she was something amazing, something he just couldn't let go.

I am in love with you.

That's what he had said, and Fay kept hearing those words again and again in her head. His voice that broke at the last word, the nervousness in his tone, the fear and the desperate hope.

His lips were so soft on hers, so gentle.

His hands found her waist, pulled her closer - his chest warm against her in the cold winter wind, a steady rock for her to lean on. He tasted of coffee and toothpaste and it made her weak on the knees, yearning for the pleasures she knew he was capable of giving to her, and a part of her wanted nothing more than to take his hand and lead him back to her room, back to her bed, to strip him naked and have him every way imaginable.

But there was no way she could do that now.

First, because it was 7AM and she was supposed to be at the HQ in a half an hour. It would be unbearable to have Near nagging her about being late again.

And secondly, because he was in love with her.

Maybe it was because she had grown up. Maybe it was because she now knew how it felt to have her heart broken, but whatever the reason, she didn't want to put Matsuda through that.

He's a good guy. He deserves to be with someone who can love him back. Someone who still has a heart.

Forcing herself to break the kiss, Fay took a step back.