More than just cake - Lawliet x OC -

Optimism

(In the picture - Goki Maeda once again. He's da cutest.)

I don't really have a lot to say about this chapter. It's by no means necessary for the plot, and nothing really happens in it. It's just a little peak into Matsuda's mind, and I think shows some of the reasons I love him. 

Please, vote and comment!  Let me know your favorite Matsuda - moment of all time.

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Matsuda had always had an easy smile.

It wasn't just a role that had fallen to him, it was rooted deep in his personality, in his soul. The optimism.

Some people called him naive, or childish because of that, but he had accepted it a long time ago. This was simply who he was. He just couldn't focus on the negative, no matter how grim the situation was.

But today, the smile on his lips was even wider than usually. It was physically impossible for him to wipe it off. Making his way down to the subway, he felt like laughing out loud, like whistling, singing for God's sake, or dancing - to do anything to show to the whole world the happiness that filled him from head to to.

To show them that he was a man in love.

I am in love with you.

The words had felt so natural to say, so right. He had never confessed his love to someone this easily - but on the other hand, he had never been in love like this before.

And so what, if Fay didn't love him back yet?

Matsuda knew that she wanted him like crazy, and he - for some reason he couldn't quite understand - seemed to possess the capability to properly please her in the bed. Just remembering the soft moans and the sharp gasps she made when he fucked her, was enough to make him hard in his pants. He had never had a girlfriend like Fay before. None of his exes had ever made him lose his control like this, made him feel like he was burning alive. He loved it, he loved that Fay was so goddamned responsive to his touch, that she came so easily, that she wanted him, wanted all of him--.

Damn! Better not to think about that in public!

Forcing the image of Fay's naked curves off his mind, Matsuda took a few running steps, to catch the subway that was already full of people. He had to squeeze to get inside - there was no traffic on Earth like the rush hour of Tokyo Metro. That was the reason he usually chose to arrive at work too early - to not hit the worst traffic hours - but today he was running late.

And for what reason?

He was pretty sure the foolish grin on his face told everyone in the subway that he had just gotten lucky, but he didn't even feel ashamed.

Yeah, he probably should've gotten home to change, but being late already, he didn't want to give Light any more reason to be disappointed in him. Besides - he had showered at Fay's place. He could easily buy a clean shirt and underwear on the lunch break.

Shower.

That thought led his mind back to Fay, and her naked body.

She had joined him in the shower, and with aching clarity Matsuda remembered how her small hands, her slender fingers had felt on his skin when she had lathered him with her strawberry shower gel. How those fingers had found their way to his groin, and--

Stop thinking about that already!

Matsuda felt his cheeks burning. Definitely not a topic you should be thinking about in a subway full of people.

But one thing was certain - even if Fay didn't love him back, she sure liked him a lot. Matsuda might not have that much experience with women, but he had a pretty solid hunch, girls didn't do things like that to guys they didn't like.

Blowjobs in the shower.

Just the memory was enough to make him hard.

Holy fuck! How on Earth did you manage to hook up with a girl like that?

He knew he was lucky as Hell - but at the same time, he wanted more.

After all, he had always been a romantic.

He wanted for Fay to return the warm and fuzzy feelings that made his heart swell. He wanted to be able to take her hand in public and call her his girlfriend. He wanted for her to look at him the same way she had looked at Ryuzaki.

Ryuzaki.

Lawliet, Fay had called him.

It wasn't that Matsuda was jealous. Ryuzaki had been dead for five years, and there hardly was any point in being jealous of a dead guy.

But Matsuda remembered the stinging bitterness he had felt when seeing how Ryuzaki had taken Fay's hand in front of him. And the one time he had walked into the hallway, only to find those two passionately kissing - Ryuzaki's fingers buried deep in Fay's red curls.

That had been the worst. It was burnt in his brain - the image of Fay's slender from in Ryuzaki's arms—

That's in the past. You're the one she's kissing now. And, he is dead.

That was his optimism speaking.

Think positive! The guy she loved is out of the picture, and she is actually free to do all that kinky stuff with you now.

He felt a bit bad for being happy about Ryuzaki's death, though, no matter how hard he tried to convince himself that he wasn't actually happy about him being dead, but just about the fact he wasn't around anymore. He was sure there was a difference.

Still. Thinking about Ryuzaki had lead him to think about other more serious topics than sex in the shower, and he felt his smile (and the pressure in his groin) somewhat diminishing.

It sure as Hell would have been easier to fall in love with someone else.

He had been at least half serious when talking about Romeo and Juliet. It was a crappy situation they found themselves in - on the opposite sides of the gaming field. How was he supposed to be wooing her, when she was convinced that he was at the enemy camp? How was he supposed to make her fall in love with him, when she didn't trust him enough to give him her phone number?

She trusted you enough to give you her name, though. That's... actually pretty huge.

The optimism. It was a good thing to have.

But being Capulet and Montague wasn't the only thing they had against them.

Even if they got over that, there were still other issues, like the fact that they lived on different continents and had barely anything in common. Not to mention the fact that Fay was a mom.

It wasn't like Matsuda didn't like kids. Actually, he liked kids a lot. He was great with children, maybe because he was so childlike himself, and he had hoped to have kids of his own one day. At least two, maybe more.

But was he really prepared to raise someone else's kid?

Ryuzaki's kid, of all people?

He pondered on the fact for a few minutes, staring out of the window. The subway stations all looked the same - filled with people, who all looked the same. Men in their dark suits, white shirts, black ties. Matsuda felt like he was staring at himself, multiplied 1000 times, trying to get into the train that was already packed.

Yeah. I would do it, if Fay asked me to.

I would do anything for her.

With that thought in his mind, he got out of the subway and walked the few remaining few blocks to the HQ. 

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... want to know my favorite Matsuda-moment in the Manga? 

Where he shoots Light, of course. That one page where he turns from a comic relief into a total badass superhero. XD

Don't forget to vote and comment.