Sometimes I write on here to distract myself from self harming. That's what I am doing right now...
Yesterday I had a very interesting experience... I was going to see a NHL game with a group of people including my boyfriend. Anyways after a
Little bus ride and food we proceeded to the entrance of the arena. This is where it all started going downhill...my boyfriend pointed out that I needed to take my phone and iPod out of my pockets so I could show the security what I had and go through the metal detector... This is when I realized that I had my blades in my jacket pocket... I knew I had to throw them out because I couldn't hide them through a metal detector... I threw the blades out... They were the last tool I had...
To make the situation 1000 times worse I also have really bad anxiety... The first anxiety attack occurred about half way through second period. I didn't know where to go and was in a huge crowd. But my boyfriend quickly helped calm me down so it wasn't a big deal.
The second attack occurred while attempting to exit the stands and a drunk man walked up behind me trying to start a fight with my boyfriend. I felt like I couldn't escape at all and was trapped. The attack lasted probably about 20 minutes since I could not get any space. But once I got on my but and had music playing the attack stopped relatively soon.
