My name is Madelin and I have a past. Just like everyone else. My life hasn't been horrible I just got bullied in school. I held high expectations for myself because I was always told I couldn't do anything. I became frustrated one day when I didn't reach my expectations in sport events... I went home and reached into my backpack. I found the mirror that broke earlier that day. I grabbed a piece and made a couple small cuts on my hip. Over the years the self harm got worse. I tried to stop but it seemed impossible. years kept passing and cuts kept widening. one day I went skiing as I enjoy such activities. Being adventurous I hit a jump larger than normal but something went wrong I went too far and landed on my side. I didn't even cry. My dad was with me and he took me to the hospital just to make sure I didn't break anything. The first hospital asked when my father was gone what the scratches on my stomach came from. I told them I wasn't sure and that's all that was said. The X-ray came back and they said I broke my pelvis in at least 2 places. I was sent to a second hospital to get a different scan to check if I had any more breaks. At the second hospital i was asked again what the scratches were from. Then he asked if I was self harming. I said that I used to but he knew they were fresh he said he would have to tell my dad..... My dad came to see me in intensive care unit I had everything covered and we just talked about skiing... Then he asked to see my IV... I lowered the blanket just a little bit but he saw the scars just below it. He asked what it was and asked why I did it. He freaked out and started crying. He asked if I had more anywhere else. I showed him my other arm, he looked more disappointed. He asked about my legs and I told him I had scars there too. But I wouldn't let him see them. I said sorry to my dad for hurting him by hurting myself. He said he loved me and just wished he could've helped. The nurses made fun of me and told me I was stupid they said things like "you know you're always going to have scars now for the rest of your life ". I lost my ability to walk and to cut all in the same day. My big secret was taken by force away from me. that is the start of my experience of my parents finding out that I cut.
