The Butchers Love

Chapter 29

A small thud made me awake and look around the room "Will?" I sleepily mumbled "Is that you?" for some reason the smell of burning wood inhabited my senses.

"Shh, go back to sleep my love" he whispered before kissing my forehead sweetly "I'll be in bed soon, I've got some work to do"

I smiled and looked towards him, his eyes were the first this I noticed. Tired and full of regret for some reason "Why don't you wait until morning? You're going to work yourself to death"

"Alright, for you" William laughed quietly and walked towards the bed "But first let me pray"

"I didn't know that you were religious"

He smiled before sitting on the edge of the bed "I believe in God and heaven" William offered me his hand before smiling. I wriggled to his side of the bed and sat on the edge like him. He nodded slightly and placed both of his hands together, I followed suit and closed my eyes.

"Rest on us, O Spirit of Love, and chase all anger, envy, and bitter grudges from our souls. Be our Comforter in trial, when the storm goes over our heads; be our Strength in the hour of weakness, and help us to control the desires of the flesh. Let us grow in faith and love, in hope, patience, and humility. See how many temptations surround us, and preserve us from giving way to them; show us the path where we should tread, for if we trust our own impulses we will go astray;
but if you lead us we shall run in the way of your commandments. Our hearts lie open before you; enter now with your rich gifts, strengthen, establish, settle them. Dwell in them and make them your temple, so shall we have the pledge of the children of God, and of our salvation.
Amen"

William looked up from his hands and then at me "Amen" I mumbled and glanced over at him.

He took off his baldric and belt before standing and laying them on a chair. His overcoat soon followed, then his boots, stockings and waistcoat. Once he joined me in bed, he took the cloth out of his hair and threw it on his bedside table.

"I love you" I leant against his shoulder. He responded by wrapping his arm around me and glancing down at me "You're really warm"

He let out a small hum in response "I love you so much, never forget that darling"

"And why would I forget that my husband loves me?"

William just smiled and laid on his side so he could face me "I truly don't deserve you"

I rested my hand on his cheek and delivered a soft peck to his lips "you do, anyway, I've never seen you pray before"

"I'm just a little lost right now, he's supposed to guide us through everything"

"You can always talk to me, I'll guide you through your darkness" I rested my hand on his chest and looked up at him "The devil was once an Angel"

"But the devil never got his redemption"

"What are you trying to say, love?" I brushed some hair out of his face and grazed my fingers over his cheek.

"Nothing" he half-whispered and brought me into a kiss "I just want you"

"I'm which way?"

"Anyway, I just need my wife" he had a slight tremble in his voice as he spoke "Can you just hold me? Please, love?"

I sat up and smiled, gesturing for him to lay his head on my lap "Come on then" I mumbled and he laid down, laying his head on my lap as he did so "All better?" I asked and William nodded slightly.

"A little" he muttered and curled up into a ball "I'm sick and tired of this war, I want to go home"

"Shh, I know" I brushed my fingers through his hair before pressing a soft kiss to his forehead "my father once told me, Brave men rejoice in adversity just as brave soldiers triumph in war"

"I'm a coward"

"If you were a coward, you would've been killed by now"

"It would be better for everyone"

"not for me" I smiled and toyed with the ends of his hair "I cannot lose my other half, can I?" he hummed in response "maybe Romeo and Juliet can have a happy ending this time around"

"we will, after this war we'll be happy"

I laid down and William wrapped his arms around me "But I do need my husband to stay alive until the end of it, just saying"

William let out a small breathy laugh and looked up at me "If I wasn't absolutely knackered, I'd be saying a lot more"

I laid down and he wrapped his arms around me once again "Get some sleep love, tomorrow is a big day"

"What do you mean?" he asked and looked up at me. His eyes were full of confusion and for some reason fear.

I furrowed my eyebrows slightly before shaking my head and smiling "You'll have to find out tomorrow, won't you"

He fake pouted and narrowed his eyes "Alright, but now I won't be able to sleep"

"Just think about how boring your workload is, that'll send you to sleep"

"Probably..." he looked up at me before nuzzling into his pillow "Good night my love"

"Good night Will"

Tavington's POV
When I knew that Mable was asleep I kissed the crown of her head softly and laid on my back, I still had an arm around her, I needed her now more than ever.

I closed my eyes for a moment and saw the slave I shot today, how his eyes went from living to lifeless in a second. Why did I do such a thing? Why have I thrown away my chances of redemption?

I need to tell her, my brutality will be the thing that kills me. Karma will come back and get me.

A life for a life...

I blink and the plantation is on fire once again, I look to the side to see my sleeping wife and guilt washes through my veins. The subtle click of a cocked musket makes me look around the room. But nothing is there.

"Would you like a lesson sir, in the rules of war? Or perhaps your children will"

my voice was not my own, I was looking at them. The children that were at that farm that day. One of them looked as young as 4...

I threatened to kill them because I am a coward who was jealous of the love their father had for them. All of this, because my father never wanted me near him. He was too busy fucking around with prostitutes.

I looked towards my sleeping wife once again and laid on my side before pulling her closer. She stirred slightly and worry shot across my features. Tomorrow, I will spend some time with her.

"Before this war is over, I'm going to kill you"