Merchant: don't worry, no one else is going to ask Zoologist out.
Player: how come?
*the moon rises and screams plus barking is heard from the other room*
Merchant: because Zoologist is terrifying.
***
Nurse: I miss when people were good and kind, before they got corrupted by the internet.
Dryad: and the Beatles.
***
*Player goes exploring into a corruption biome to see what Nurse was on about*
You feel vibrations from deep below...
The Destroyer has awoken!
***
*a new Guide arrives*
Guide: where's Player?
Dryad; they're uh, busy.
Nurse: being an idiot.
Guide: what kind of idiot?
Nurse: the "oh god I didn't think Destroyer would kill all my npc's" kind.
***
Player, holding a knife: you know what this is?
Destroyer: ...a knife?
Player: no: it's a ketchup piñata stick. If you hit someone hard enough with it, out comes ketchup with no pain!
Player, mumbling: to the person holding the knife anyways..
Destroyer: ...
Destroyer: AWESOME!
***
Destroyer, after killing pretty much all the npc's: SAY YOU'RE SORRY!
Player: I'M SORRY!
Destroyer: and what are you sorry for?
Player, sobbing: for saying you're aggressive!
***
Destroyer and Player: *still fighting each other*
Player: *getting beaten up by Destroyer's drones*
Guide, who somehow lived: we should do something about that.
Nurse, who also somehow lived: yeah. looking good, Player!
***
Player: what's the problem with monster hunters?
Destroyer: if you're a side character, you die within the first 10 minutes.
Destroyer: dude wait, am I a side character?!
The Destroyer has been defeated!
Player: yes, yes you are
***
*Player makes their way back home, talking to the new Guide and swearing they won't fight Wall of Flesh again*
Player: I just have one question.
Guide: what is it, Player?
Player: what colour is an orange?
Guide: Player, you bonehead. It's the same colour as it's name, just like a lemon.
YOU ARE READING
Incorrect Terraria Quotes
RandomRead the title And no I don't have an obsession in bosses with eyes, why do you ask
