Being Different

The Grey Rabbit

A/N: Damien learns the significance of his special toy...only to discover betrayal and deceit...

Dedicated to: onedopegirl alltimesTorment

I sat in the day room, happily reading my books until dad knocked and opened the door. He peered around the door and called me to come into the study. There was some important news that had come through some of their operatives. It appeared that those men who had ransacked grandma's home, (technically my home now since it was legally mine after her death) and who hurt me had been finally apprehended near the Mexican border, together with the head of the operation.

They were being brought back by federal agents to stand trial for crimes ranging in severity from trafficking in drugs, weapons to kidnapping, rape and murder. When I heard the news, a part of me rejoiced while the other part wanted to crawl away and hide. It would be a week or two at least before all the paperwork could be done. Meanwhile, they were cooking in some Mexican jail for a bit before the extradition back to California.

I was nervous with the prospect of seeing my captors. Although I could not see them, I still distinctly remembered their voices. The police were going on my positive identification of these men, which made the task more daunting.

"Damien, are you alright, son?" My father had a look of concern etched upon his face as he came closer to me.

"I...No, I'm not alright. I confess that I am scared, dad...scared of what they might do to retaliate if they found out that I was testifying against them..." I answered truthfully.

"I promise that you will come to no harm...But they need you to testify. It's the only way" He gently placed his broad hands upon my shoulders. "Son, do you still have the present I gave you? The little grey rabbit?" He asked.

I nodded, then left the study, immediately going to my room. I reached over the side of the bed, grabbing my rucksack. I pulled out the scruffy little toy from the inner pocket of my bag, smiling softly at it before handing it over to him.

"I need to do a little operation on this little fellow. I promise he will come to no harm, ok?" He smiled, leading me out the doorway back towards the study.

Alma, had brought a sewing kit and a pair of scissors. My father set the little grey rabbit on his desk, face down and proceeded to unstitch the back seam carefully, so as not to tear into the delicate fabric of the stuffed animal. He then extracted a small, metal canister roughly five to six inches in height. It suddenly dawned on me that this was the very thing that those men were looking for, since they were so adamant that I had it.

I watched as my dad patched up the small rabbit as good as new. He, then, turned around and plonked it into my open palm. I grinned but was curious as to what was inside that canister.

My father gingerly twisted the top off and pulled a thick wad of cotton wool from within the canister. He then, carefully unwrapped the cotton wool, extracting a thin wire with some very small tweezers. Hawkes handed him a small metal conductor of sorts, where we pinched the thin wire in between two slots. Hawkes then removed it and placed the entire piece into the master computer.

Dad then logged in, and soon one of the screens slid down automatically, to reveal code upon code in linear form. I was mesmerized by the vastness of the data within one single wire strip. It seemed to take ages to load, but eventually it finished, and I understood what it all meant. These were coordinates to the secret rendezvous taking place sometime mid-week, next week when heads of state would be visiting to discuss nuclear disarmaments in politically unstable countries. It dawned on me that the secret rendezvous was just one of many that they were discussing that time I had entered the drawing room downstairs.

"Hey, what are you thinking about?" My dad looked at me, eyebrows furrowed with a look of concern.

"I never knew that I was carrying a vital piece of information. All I knew was how much I loved this rabbit simply because it was a gift from you..." I pondered, as I held the tiny stuffed toy in my hands. "You used me...you used us, grandma and me to keep this information safe..." I suddenly blurted in an accusatory tone, which automatically came out of me. Dad stiffened, turning towards me, eyes widening at the sound of my voice.

"I never meant for you or Cora to get embroiled in all this espionage. I entrusted Martha and Robert and William to take care of you in case I...in case I died..." He tried to explain.

I suddenly felt an overwhelming sense of betrayal rise up within me. "I nearly died for this information...BOTH Martha and Robert nearly died for this information..." I suddenly stood up, causing the chair to fall backwards to the floor with a loud thud. I began to squeeze that little rabbit in my hand as if I was choking the life out of it.

"Dad, do you love me? Do you really love me?" I asked him.

"What are you getting at, De...Damien? Of course, I love you!!!" He stood up, coming towards me, but I backed away from him until I felt the wall behind my back.

I shook my head, wanting to bolt from the room. I felt like I wanted to scream...to shut out this world I suddenly found myself in. Why did I feel this way? Why did I suddenly hate him so?

"Damien...I..." But before he could go any further, I had managed to slide my body towards the door, turning the handle quickly. My legs carried me to the nearest exit, leading out into the back garden, where I followed a small, pebbled path to a stone bench under a huge Sycamore tree.

I sank down, holding the rabbit to my chest. The sudden overwhelming anger that loomed within me now spilled out in the form of angry, hot tears streaming down my cheeks. I heard the soft crunching of pebbles underfoot as he approached slowly. I kept my head down deliberately, unable to look him in the eyes.

My dad crouched in front of me, looking up into my tear-stained face. "I never meant to hurt you. I had been ordered to keep that information safe and it tore me up inside, having to keep that from both of you and also both Robert and Martha. But if you knew what was inside, the worse the situation could have been...I never meant for any of you to be in danger...ever...please trust me on this...I had to fake my death so that they wouldn't come after you...But I guess that wasn't enough to deter them completely...was it?" He sighed, feeling great remorse as he kept his gaze on me.

I shook my head, still palming the little grey rabbit in my hand. I looked at its' tattered, shabby shape but it still had this cute, silly little grin on its' face...something which was so endearing to me. I couldn't help but smile, remembering all our adventures together with grandma.

"Please forgive me, Damien...Forgive your stupid old man for making such horrible mistakes in his life! Please give me a chance to make it up to you" He placed his head on my lap. I raised my hand and gently stroked the curls on his dark head. This was my father, whom I only knew as a kind young man who not only bought me treats, but pushed me on the swings and spoke a lot with grandma at the park.

"Dad...I...I forgive you...But promise me that you won't keep me in the dark about anything ever again...even if it could be detrimental for us both...I'd rather know that than be lied to...I'm almost an adult you know. I can take it..." I said.

He rose up and sat by my side, giving me an affirming nod.

"Fair enough...You're right. You're almost an adult and I can't baby you. I just need you to be careful and safe. Now that we've found each other, I can't afford to lose you ever again. You're such a big strong young man, I can hardly even put my arms around you!" He remarked, chuckled softly as he pulled me close to him and wrapped an arm around me.

With that, I turned to face him, and we hugged each other in silence, my tears pricking my eyes. I felt his heart thump against my own as our chests met, with the little grey rabbit looking on from my pocket in proud confirmation.