Left To Survive

XVII

꧁ Yara ꧂

4 PM

After sitting on the bench for an hour, or more, I went back home. It was close to the park, and even though I strolled carelessly, I arrived at my house in 10 minutes.

I rang the bell and my mother opened the door for me.

"Hey, mom," I said. "Hi Yara, everything good?" she asked me with an emotionless face. I sighed. This hypocrite behavior is getting tiring. "Yeah, everything good, thank you." She nodded and went back to the kitchen.

Ever since the incident she has been awkwardly nice to me, it low-key freaked me out. But I was too tired to think about what her plan with me might be. I was glad as long as it lasted. But nothing really lasted. At least, nothing good.

I went up to my room. It was still a mess. I hadn't opened the curtains in what felt like a month. Old clothes lied everywhere, books and dishes were spread on the floor, on my table, even in my bed.

I stared at it for some time while I was standing in the doorway. I knew I should clean it up, that I'd feel better to be in a clean room. But I just couldn't find the strength. It took everything out of me to pretend I was doing okay with Alisha, trying to look confident, happy, fulfilled. For her. I didn't want her to worry about me... For as long as it lasted.

I didn't want to hurt her anymore than I will.

ꕥ ꕥ ꕥ ꕥ ꕥ ꕥ ꕥ ꕥ

7 PM

Looking for the disinfectant in my room I stumbled upon some clean pink-colored papers. An idea started forming in my head.

First off I finished my search for the disinfectant and took care of the fresh cuts, that were now all over my legs. I was disgusted of myself and put my pants back on as soon as I could. I couldn't look at those. It started off innocently, but now... If anyone would see- Shit.

Trying to forget about it, I took the pink papers that I found earlier and stared at them. How do I even begin writing? And who do I write to?

That was easy enough: Alisha, Aaron. Friends from school.

Should I write to my mom? Did she deserve it? And what would I even write, damnit. Frustrated I got up and walked through my little room for a bit before sitting back down.

Finally, I decided who to start with.

Dear dad,

I'm sorry that you have to see me like this. If only you wouldn't have left, things would be so much different...
And I wouldn't be writing you this...

ꕥ ꕥ ꕥ ꕥ ꕥ ꕥ ꕥ ꕥ

꧁ Alisha ꧂

It was night. I woke from the middle of a nightmare, full of sweat. I panted, the scary images from the dream were still haunting my mind, and I sat up to come back to reality.

I realized that my throat was dry, and I went to the kitchen to get myself a glass of water. On my way I wrote to Yara.

Me: Just had a nightmare... You up?

Yara: Of course. Can't sleep

Me: Wanna see something cool?

Yara: Yeah

I grabbed myself a glass of water and went to my plant conservatory. Immediately I felt a difference in the room. Normally the plants all softly slept during the night, but now... Something was different. Different vibe, different light, I couldn't put my finger on it. I opened the camera app on my phone to take a picture of my new plant to show it to Yara.

but I almost dropped my phone. The moon was shining right on it, but that wasn't what surprised me. The little plant wasn't little anymore. It had grown. It grew three times the size. It was also... shining? Literally, light came off of it. 

I was standing there with my jaw dropped, I didn't understand... The flower went through a whole transformation in a matter of hours. Scared that the flower would transform back soon, I took a picture of it and sent it to Yara

Yara: Omg, that's beautiful! Where did you get it from?

Me: Remember the strange object I was carrying home?

Yara: Oof, that was unexpected

Me: You tell me

After the conversation with Yara I sat in front of the Moon flower. That's what I decided to call it. I think it fits. I sat there until I was cold, and then took a blanket and sat there for at least another hour.

It was so beautiful, and I enjoyed being in its presence. It felt like an honor.