DUALS - JENSOO - english version

KJ

At what point did everything get out of my hand? Or have I ever been in control one day?

At what point did I start making this series of wrong decisions that has brought me so far?

Was it flirting with Kim while we were naked in the bathroom? Was that when I felt a slight empathy for Krystal Jung and decided to invent this plan for revenge?

"Are you really going to miss your show?" Krystal's voice makes me clench my teeth.

"I said I didn't want to participate and you blackmailed me."

"Don't be like I'm the only one to blame, Sooya. That would happen with or without you, the difference being that you chose not to be affected by the exposure." she laughs and I take a deep breath.

"Go have fun and leave me alone!" I support my hands on the parapet.

"Don't feel so guilty, if the situation were otherwise, I bet your beloved Jennie would not hesitate for a second to end you." I feel her approach me "I thought the kiss Jenkai would be more than enough proof to prove it to you."

"I TOLD YOU TO LEAVE ME ALONE!"

"Calm down, nerd, you've been very nervous lately, remember the photos and..." I turn and push her against the parapet, placing my hand on her neck.

"I'm not in the mood to put up with you for another second, so pay close attention to what I'm going to tell you" I squeeze my fingers and Krystal looks at me startled "You blackmailed me and I did what you wanted, our relationship ends now. Go and enjoy your damn show and never think to talk to me again, or I swear to God, I'm going to finish you in a way that you can't imagine, even in your worst nightmares. Did you understood, Krystal?" I squeeze tighter and she nods as she squeezes my wrist. I let her go and she starts coughing "Now get out, go back to the sewer hole you left."

"Jisoo?" Rosé's soft voice makes me turn around "What's going on?" she approaches me as I watch Krystal walk away.

"How much did you hear?" I say without looking at her.

"Everything." she stays by my side. The two of us looking at the illuminated city. It would be a beautiful night, if it were not tragic.

"Accidentally, I found out that Kai was cheating on Jennie. I thought it was fun to know this secret for a while, the most popular girl was being betrayed" I let out a low laugh and sigh "One day after sleeping with Jennie for the first time, I found Krystal crying for Kai and, at the time, I still hated her and came up with a plan to expose it, but then I fell in love with Kim and told Krystal I was out." I close my eyes and take a deep breath "That short time span was happy days, but then Krystal took pictures of Jennie and me."

"Blackmail."

"If I didn't help her, she would not only expose Kai's betrayal, but expose what happened between Jennie and me." my eyes sting and I take a deep breath again "I didn't want to accept it at first, but then there was that situation in the cafeteria and I was so angry."

"Did you accept revenge for that? Why did Jennie agree to come to the dance with Kai?" strangely, there's no judgmental tone in her voice.

"I thought so, so I realized that Jennie's strong, she'll get over it with Kai, but I don't know how she would react if what happened between us was exposed like that, mainly because she still doesn't know how to deal with it with your sexuality." I sigh and support my chin in my hand.

"I wanted to hate you for being so stupid" she says after a few minutes, I didn't expect anything different, after all, they're best friends "But you love her so much, that even when you hate her, you make decisions thinking about her, instead of think of your hate."

"Maybe I love her more than I know." I say thoughtfully "But it doesn't matter anymore, we would never be together anyway" I shrug and look at the clock "It's almost time for the announcement, Kim will need you." I turn to her.

"But what about you?" she looks at me confused.

"I'm Jisoo. I'm okay." she laughs and hugs me tightly before leaving and I hurry to wipe away the tear that ended up running down my cheek.

*******

Fresh air. This is what I needed to purify my lungs of all the toxicity of gossip and rumors that is running wild through this school.

Have you ever thanked the trees for the clean air you breathe and pretend it alleviates guilt in your conscience? I have.

I'm sitting on one of the tables in the school garden and adjusting my glasses on my face while reading a book, or trying, because Seulgi and Lisa can't keep silent.

"What do you think Kim is going to do?" Seulgi says.

"She's evil, I bet she'll kick Kai's ass in an unforgettable way."

"I felt sorry for her. She cried so much on stage." I bite my apple when I hear Seulgi and turn the page of the book.

"Me either! She looked so small and helpless, so sensitive, like a baby."

"Enough of that gossip near me. I don't want to hear about it anymore."

"Don't you hate her? Shouldn't you be happy with that?" Lisa looks at me confused. "Jung's brave, everyone knows that she was responsible for everything."

"Lisa, I don't want to know more about Jennie Kim and her love life."

"OH MY GOD!" Seulgi jumps up and looks irritated "I DON'T BELIEVE THAT I LOST 100 DOLLARS!" she shouts to no one in particular. Lisa and I look at her like she's crazy.

"The bear freaked out." Lisa says and I'm laughing.

"Kim Jisoo, you owe me 50 bucks!" Seulgi points the finger at me.

"In your dreams."

"I lost a bet with Irene."

"And what do I have to do with it?"

"Because of you, I lost."

"What are you talking about?" Lisa's always lost.

"Jisoo was having sex with Jennie, so I lost the bet!" I choke when I hear Seulgi.

"You're really crazy." Lisa laughs and I'm still choking. "Right, unnie?"

"Are you going to deny it, Jisoo? Because I see no reason why Jennie lied to Joohyun."

"That's not the worst part of the story." I shake my head, staring at the apple. The forbidden fruit, just as Jennie was for me, was my undoing. "I fell in love with her."