It's Time To Go

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A few weeks have past, and today is the day I fly to Los Angeles. I can’t believe that a year has passed right under my nose. Andy and I could not believe that it was actually happening. We were standing at the airport entrance. There were a lot of people coming and going, but it feels like it was just Andy and I, as if the rest was a blur. Andy wouldn’t look me in the eyes, he would look away and pretended to get distracted. It was as if he was looking for something to say. He then held me in my shoulders and gained the courage to look me in the eyes, “Are you sure you want to do this? No second thoughts?”

            “I think I want to do this. It’s part of the plan right? It’s like it was destined to happen.”

            “Right…” He looked down and smiled sadly, “I hate you for doing this.” He let out a little chuckle,

            “Don’t be, I’m sorry. It breaks me too…” I swallowed, “Andy, I’ve grown up…”

            “Yes, you have.” He pinched both my cheeks, “You know? One minute, you were sitting on my lap with your favorite pacifier… And the next… You’re about to cross the Atlantic Ocean all by yourself…”

            “Yea, I’ll finally get out of your hair… I’m sorry I’ve been troublesome…”

            “No, don’t say that. You’re not, okay?” He shook my shoulders and then sighed, “Time flies…”

            “Too fast…” I mumbled back,

            “Listen…” His tone changed, it became firm somehow. “If you ever need someone- anyone… Just call me, anytime. Call me anytime, alright?” I nodded, “I’ll try to fly to Los Angeles as soon as I can. You can call me anytime, don’t even think about the time difference, it’s okay. Promise me?”

            “I promise. You don’t have to worry about me anymore, Andy. You’ve taught me well…” I swallowed, “You’re the best big brother a girl could have!” He looked down, slightly neglecting it.

            “I’m so proud of you!” He pulled me into my favorite hug of all time and kissed my head. He has helped me get through tough times with this. It may not look special to others, but it feels special to me. I suddenly had a flashback. It was when fell off my bike and scraped my knee, I was only around six and he was twelve or thirteen. I just sat there, frozen in shock. I was at the front of our house. I tried to stay calm and called Andy. He came and saw me sitting on the ground. All he said was ‘Did it hurt?’ and smirked at me. It stung like hell, but I kept it to myself. He understood and told me that it will be all right. He then picked me up and brought me inside. It was one of those moments when a random memory of your past pops up. It felt like hours, when it was actually only a few minutes. Unfortunately, the intercom had to break us, and we hesitantly pulled away.  

            “I know I never say this before…” I started, “But I love you, big brother. Aside from you being a nosy bastard, I still love you…” I blurted,

            “I know. I love you too… Take good care of yourself alright?”

            “Don’t worry, I will… It’s going to be okay.” I nodded and took a few steps back before turning around to face a new ‘life’. I tried resisting the urge to look back, but I couldn’t. I saw Andy and he caught me looking at him, so he just smiled and waved. I took a brave step and boarded the plane. I tried to sleep it off, but I ended up staring at blank spaces instead.

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