Eternal Love [Jenlisa]

Chapter 34

LISA'S POV

My ears had been attentively listened to the angelic, warm voice, yet also laced with fear and a slight shaky breathe in every words that came out from her mouth.i have the attempt to put her in ease, yet the fear taking over me that prevented me from doing so

I was restless, when i saw her walked inside my room.but masking my fear somehow is one of the useless thing that i'm good at.being nonchalant despite of the frantic beats of my heart,and blurting out any mean word that i could think of just to make me look tough in front of someone that i refuse to be seen as weak

I could see right in her eyes, telling a thousand of unspoken pain upon the hurtful words coming from me, which something that i did without having any purpose of hurting her feelings other than to make myself look emotionally strong

But when those tears fell out from her eyes,my lips became firmly sealed, while my stiff hands were struggling to keep it down to my lap as i have the urge to wrapped my hands around her ,and soothe her in my embrace

In any kind of battle, i'll never even get to dream of winning during this kind of circumstances.seeing jennie showing her vulnurability side, could triggered my weakness, which often causing me to giving in

But this time ,i was hesitant

Because the fear is still lingering in my head, telling all the possible concequences that could happened by the action,which made me afraid

I'm afraid of, letting my filthy hands touching her skin

The touch from the woman,

"I never even once consider you as my wife!"

That she consider as nothing in her life

I'm afraid that she might be disgusted of my touch

"Are you okay?"

My gaze went up from the bedsheet to my father, who's staring at me from the side with a creased eyebrows

"I'm sorry, what did you said again?" My head shakes while slightly turned my body to him, trying to be more attentive to our conversation

"I saw her crying"

It doesn't came out as a statement to let me know about what he saw.it's sounds more like a question, as if asking for a confirmation for his uncertain assumptions through my expression

"So she's really crying?" Upon my silence, he asked again

"Dad.."

"You made her cried?"

"Dad," i sigh , feeling horrible as my back find the hard surface of the bed, resting it there with another sigh being let out

The image of her crying helplessly couldn't leave from my mind. the beams she had on her face that slowly faded when it wasn't be reciprocated.and the grief in her eyes, it's all running in my head that makes the guilt rose up inside my chest

Her eyes used to be flamed with resent whenever i was around , with the words that came out from her mouth that convinced the hatred of her towards me

But this time , it was different

As longer as i look at her

I'm starting to wonder about why does she look like that,

Fragile, frail, helpless.

Something that's new for me to see,and the sight of it is thoroughly detested by me

The desperation in her eyes,

The remorse, and the vulnerability

Those few things that makes me surrendered in the battle, and finally bring her to my arms, trying everything i could to lessen the grief in her eyes