CHAPTER 13

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Perrie pov : I sat in the chair and looked into the mirror. My hair was being done behind me. I kept looking at my phone for a text. Today we we're attending an event. I was extremely nervous , I haven't really done anything like this since Fey was born. I nervously played with my phone tapping the screen. What if I haven't lost Enough weight , what if I look bad. All these thoughts floated around my mind. Zayn was at home with Fey. I was waiting for him to text me back , I've left him alone before with her. I just wanted to know everything was alright. I guess it's okay, if he hasn't texted back because he's with her. Jesy walked over " nervous Hun " , I nodded my head. " why you look amazing and if there is any negative comments, don't listen your gorgeous " she smiled. I smiled back " thanks Hun I don't know why I'm nervous ". " it's normal jade was nervous after she had poppy ". I nodded she was right everyone's insecure, after they have a baby. Jade was really scared , after poppy was born we were going to attend the Brits. She was so scared we had to go late. She was in tears and almost had a panic attack on the carpet. It was horrific to watch it hurt to see her so nervous. I turned my rings around my finger, over and over again. My phone let off a Bing , good luck tonight we are fine don't worry, love you remember you look gorgeous. I smiled at the text from Zayn he could always cheer me up. I replied back thank you Z, love you both lots. I set down my phone a bit I felt more calm. My phone went of again it was a picture of Fey and Zayn. I let out a huge smile. After my hair was done I walked to see my dress , it was amazing. It was a black dress that ended just before my knees , with sleeves that ended before my elbows and a turtle neck. My hair was done in a hair ponytail, and I had a red lip on. To complete the look I had simple black heels and and red handbag. I walked towards the girls " LOOK AT YOU HOT MOMMA " Leigh cheered. I smiled " you look gorgeous yourself " I said. " Pez you are a hot " jade winked. We all got into the car that toke us to the event. It wasn't a fancy event. We walked towards the carpet my hands got sweaty. Jade tapped my shoulder " it's alright Pez you look amazing ". I got about a thousand butterfly's In my stomach. I was shaking on the carpet , jade held my hand to calm me down. We slowly moved down the carpet with people telling us to look here. It was so over whelming all I saw was flashing cameras , and herd screams from all around. My hand got tugged by Leigh to show me to move along. We walked over to the first interviewer. She started talking but I couldn't hear her words. " Perrie " she questioned hmm I widened my eyes. " I asked how it feel to be a mom " she repeated. I opened my mouth to answer but I couldn't describe it. " it's its amazing " I stuttered out. " being a mum has been the best thing to happen to me " a big smiled formed across my cheeks. " she nodded her head and moved on from me. I hadn't thought about how much, I love being a mum or being A mum at all. For the rest of the night I thought about it. It's all I thought about. The show went by really quickly. On the way home In the car jade asked me " Perrie you know how that lady asked you how it felt to be a mum ,well the rest of the night you zoned out why ". " I was thinking about it all night I can't describe the bloody feeling ". Jade giggled " I can't either it's just life changing but in a good way ". I nodded my head we dropped the topic and talked for the ride home about the show. When I got home it was around 2:00 am. I yawned and put my key into the door , the door let out a small noise. I toke off my heels and sighed in relief. I walked up stairs past our room ,Zayn was fast asleep with a Pacifier In his hand. I giggled and walked into Fey's room. She was passed out ,she had the stuffed bunny snugged close to her chest. I smiled she was so peaceful. She made tiny breathing noises. I wanted to hold her but she needed sleep. The way her tiny fingers held onto the bunny ,made me want to scream in awe. I walked down into the living room I placed the lap top on my lap. " what's it's like to be a mum ". Whenever I needed to get something out ,I typed it and kept it in a folder. " being a mum is an ,un describable feeling of love and joy. From the moment you find out your having a baby it's a un describable love. It's a love like any other I thought I loved Zayn I thought I loved my parents I thought I loved the girls. but my love for Fey is a stronger love. I mean love my family and friends so much. my love for Fey is so strong. I only want happiness for her and my heart breaks when she Cry's. I know she's mine forever no matter how old she is I'm always her mummy. It scares me that something could happen to her and my baby would be gone. I will do anything to keep her safe and protect her. She means so much to me she makes me so happy. I just can't ever describe to her how much I love her forever and always I will love and take care of her......

AUTHORS NOTES: Hi so have you guys ever lost a friend ? If you have I'm so sorry it's so shitty. Don't worry keep going on with your life. Show them you don't need their Bull shit, be a strong independent teenager you are.
carry on you don't need their negative energy. No matter how hard it is to let them go....
Thanks so much for all the reads it makes me feel so loved 💕💕

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