Attached- Tsukishima Kei

22

'Where are you? I really need you right now'

It was a text sent out of panic and despair, but when I open up the hotel room door to reveal Kei, I don't regret it at all.

I move out the way for him to come in and he hesitantly slips his shoes off. I lead him to the bed and quietly sit down.

"Oh shit. Athena- your hands. They're shaking so bad." He immediately sits next to me, grabbing my hands in his. "What's going on? Stop looking at me with that blank face."

As soon as I had seen Watabe show up at that party, until now, I've forced myself to just shut down.

Showing no emotion felt better than showing all of them. But I can't take it anymore. I tried to hard to keep myself composed since my doctors visit but I can no longer hide my feelings.

I move my hands from Kei's, reaching out to grip his shirt and pull him forward. I bury my face in his chest and wrap my arms around him as my entire body begins to shake and tears pour out of my eyes like I'm a waterfall.

"I-I'm pregnant." I choke out, feeling Kei freeze.

"But you're on the pill?" He wraps his arms around me, rubbing my back soothingly.

I shake my head, unable to answer him as I sob out all the emotions I've kept hidden.

Kei stays quiet, just simply rubbing my back and allowing me to let it all out until he eventually starts cooing encouraging things into my ear.

Eventually, when my eyes are hurting and I cannot physically cry anymore, I push myself out of Kei's embrace and quickly go splash water on my face. Once I come back out I lay on my back on the bed, laying my arm across my eyes.

"I hate my life." I state. "My husband hates me and wants to fuck a racist, ugly bitch. I can't have friends, I can't even fucking go home, my boss is annoying as shit, and now I'm pregnant."

"I don't hate you." He says quietly, and I feel him take my free hand into his. "Nor do I want anything that has to do with Watabe. I'm so, so sorry. I promise I will do better. Don't leave me...please don't leave me. I married you because I love you and I am so sure that you're it for me. We didn't get married too young and I'll never regret it. I won't be immature and jealous anymore. I'm so sorry."

I move my arm from my face, peeking over at him. A heavy sigh leaves my lips and I sit up to peck his cheek.

"You're an idiot. Seriously. I'm so mad and hurt right now but I don't want a divorce." I voice and he looks relieved, taking me into his arms again.

"I'm sorry. I got really scared- and I know it's nowhere near a good excuse but I couldn't stand the thought of losing you or seeing you happy with someone else..." Kei gulps and I shake my head, sighing.

"So you try to hurt me?" I look away from him, fiddling with my fingers. "Kei...you didn't do anything with her, right? Did you even flirt with her?" I ask weakly, scared of the answer.

I feel him grab my chin and he forces me to look at him, regret and remorse showing in his eyes.

"I promise I didn't." He replies, leaning his forehead against mine. "I just called her and asked if she wanted to come to a party, sent the address, and that's it. She did try to grab my arm once you went upstairs to grab your stuff but I pushed her off of me and told her to go home. I swear on my life that's all that happened."

"Did you think of cheating on me?" I ask, pulling away and keeping my eyes down. "I mean- what was your intention of calling her? Did you want her to be all up on you so I'd get jealous? I just can't wrap my head around it."

"No. No- god no. I just thought that her simply being there should be enough for you to...I don't know. Get angry? Feel the way I felt?" He rubs his hands down his face and groans.

"W-We're not dating, Kei." I put my head in my hands. "You can't just do things like that. We're supposed to be married. Were your vows all lies? I can't believe you...this is so unfair."

My mental health since I found out I was pregnant just a bit ago went 📉. All my emotions feel heightened and I know I'm being so dramatic but I can't help it.

"Hey...don't say that. Please don't ever say that. They weren't lies. I love you more than anything in the world and I will do anything to make it-"

"Why do you even have her number?" I cut him off, realizing that small factor I didn't remember before.

Kei freezes for a second and I scoff, about to get up. He grabs my hand though, immediately getting his phone out and typing away at it.

"Please no- it's not what you're thinking. I just got a bit surprised that's all." He turns the screen towards me and I see messages between his coach from that day, asking for Watabe's number.

Then he shows me his messages with Watabe and the only thing he sent is exactly what he told me.

My heart calms down a little, and I slump against his chest.

"I can't do this anymore. This is dumb. I'm sorry for not setting boundaries with Rin. I should have done something or seen that he was going to pick me up or something. I'm sorry." I close my eyes, tired of all of this.

"That's nothing to be apologizing for. You couldn't have known." He wraps his arms around me. "I'm the one who's sorry. I should have never tired to hurt you. I'll work on my jealousy, okay? I love you so much. I love you, Athena."

A small sigh leaves my lips and I open my eyes, cuddling further into his body.

"P-Please say it back." Kei whispers and my eyes widen before I look up at him.

"Sorry. I love you too." I peck his lips and he buries his head in my shoulder.

"So...you're pregnant?"

"Shut up before I have another mental breakdown."