Back to Black (girlxgirl)

She's Just a Friend!

(Lily’s POV)

                Meting up with Sloane had been enlightening and much needed. As much insight as she provided, she was also there just to listen. She’s never one to just shove her opinion in my face about how I should fix my problems. Rather, its constructive criticism that is usually more helpful than not. Contrasting her friendship to any advice Nick gives me, the two are totally disanalogous. Nick has no problem with making me see his way on any given problem. He’s always got the solution. That’s why; it’s refreshing to reveal my secrets to Sloane. I know she won’t try to fix it for me.

                What started out as an unbearable day turned into something fun and relaxing. We ended up meeting in the park and getting some greasy hot dogs from a vendor with three missing front teeth. Since it was so hot, we ended up dipping our feet in the fountain and just staying there. I had looked out on the children actually swimming in the fomey, green, water. Those children either had really big balls or were just in desperate need of a swimming pool.

                Nonetheless, it was nice to get a splash or two from the gleeful kids. Sloane sure enjoyed it when any of the children sat on one of the sprinklers. She said it took her back to when her parents once took the family to a water park--  which was their only rea family vacation. We shared a lot of stories in each other’s company both especially laughing about our boring summers. I told her the only thing that has kept me sane is Petal cuddling with me at night. “Wait,” she had stopped me, “you still have Petal?” Suddenly, it had dawned on me that the poor Momsen girls never actually learned of Petal’s real relocation. “Taylor seriously thinks you gave her to a pound. Dude, if she finds out you better board your house up because she’ll be coming with spiked dog collar in hand.” She stopped speaking and then opened her mouth again, “Lily you really need to give her back.”

                “Why should I give her back? I bought her,” I humphed and crossed my arms.

                Sloane had giggled at my stubbornness, “That’s rude to take back presents. Plus, Taylor needs Petal. Like I said before, she’s a bit lonely. She needs a companion.”

                I frowned, “Am I supposed to feel sorry that she’s a depressed friendless asshole.” I remembered that I was supposed to be forgiving Taylor not berating her.

                Sloane had looked at me with those disapproving eyes, “Now Lily, that’s not fair. She has changed. Seriously, if you don’t want to accept it then that’s no one’s fault but yourself. Also, she isn’t depressed. She’s just alone. She’s surrounded by people who all make money off of her. They are her friends but at what cost? I know it may be too soon and all but when she gets back into the city, it might be nice for you guys to go for coffee or something. She just needs a real friend; one that isn’t her sister.”

                Sloane’s admission actually made me feel sympathy for my previous love. Maybe we’ve both just had it kind of hard. “I’m sorry Sloane; I let my emotions get out of control. I don’t know if I can be her friend right now, though. I need some more time. I don’t even know if I can be her friend at all.” Sloane nodded at my apology but I could see sadness in her eyes.

                By the end of our conversation, the moon was shining bright and I realized I needed to be getting home. I had work the next day. I ended up walking Sloane back to Taylor’s apartment because I felt obligated to which was a lot harder than I thought it would be. Every time I looked next to me I expected to see blonde hair, not brunette. I expected the familiar soft but calloused hand to grab mine as we past Mercer Street. I certainly wasn’t prepared for Sloane to ask me, “Do you want to sleepover?” My ears registered it in the raspy voice that had asked me that question numerous times before.  For a second, my vision tricked me and standing a few inches taller and skinnier with those piercing blue eyes was my dangerous ex. I had to shake my head and let reality set back in.