I'm sorry...~America

Truth seryum

~Alfred's POV~
"Hey babe can you help me I can't find Jessie's binkie" I reached my hand under the crib to feel around for my daughter's pacifier but I couldn't feel anything, I stuck my head under for a sec to try and see it. "I think it's downstairs Alfred" I groaned and cursed under my breath before hitting my head underneath the crib. "Sh-" I bit my tongue and sat up holding my head, Christina chuckled and kissed my forehead before squatting down in front of me, "are you okay? Let me see" I shook my head and moved my hand, "it's just a bump...damn that hurt.." she chuckled again and held my face. She just sat there and stared at me...no hugs no kisses...no teasing remarks...she just stared at me smiling.
"Um...Chris? You doing okay babe?"
"Hm? Oh yeah sorry...it just feels like it's been a while since I've been able to...have a moment with you" I frowned a little and kissed her gently, "well...your right it has been a while...with the kids and you being in the hospital...We should go out tomorrow, just the two of us"
She frowned and sat next to me.
"But your uncle just got here, shouldn't you spend some time with him?"
"Jeez I've got the rest of my life to spend with him, plus every time we hang out I get blasted and wake up feeling like death" Christina rolled her eyes.
"Okay okay...well then mr light weight where are we going? We are in England after all we should use it to our advantage" I rubbed the bump on my head and thought to myself for a minute, I've never been anywhere fancy in England other than the palace...and that was back when I was a kid waaay before the revolution.
"It's a surprise, it's more fun if you don't know where we're going" Christina gave me an unsure look.
"Uh huh...and what about the twins?"
"Well there's four other people in the house that are qualified to watch them, I'll just ask them and see who'll take them for a few hours" Christina chuckled and leaned against me, "okay then, but do it now before they make plans tomorrow...I'm going to go take a shower" I smiled and kissed her cheek before helping her up, "alright, if I'm back soon enough maybe I'll join you~" I winked at her which made her blush before she waved me off and walked into the bathroom. She's so cute when she's embarrassed.
I went across the hall to Matt and Ailbe's room and raised my fist up to knock on the door but stopped when I heard a whimper followed by some creaking.
Oh Jesus Christ I don't need to know what Matt sounds like when he's doing that shit! "M-maple!~"
I heard Matthew cry out from behind the door and I felt goosebumps crawl up and down my spine.
On one hand I'm grossed out since he's my brother...on the other hand I'm so glad I heard that because now I can hold it I've his head forever.
I covered my ears and continued on down the hall to Dad and pops room and knocked lightly on the door.
"Dad?" I whispered quietly and waited for a reply, but no one responded. I slowly turned the door knob and surprisingly it wasn't locked so I cracked the door open a bit to see if they were in bed. Francis was clutching a pillow tightly and curled up sound asleep in bed, but Arthur wasn't there.
I slowly closed the door and decided to check Arthur's study, I headed towards the stairs and stopped when I heard some shuffling in another room down the hall, I think it's the guest room where Allistor is staying. I quietly made my way over to his room, as I got closer I could hear faint whispering but I couldn't make out what was being said...I arrived in front of Allistors door and pressed my ear against it.
"So all I have to do is get her to wear it?"
"That's right...as long as she has it on her person somewhere she'll live...but if it breaks and we loose the hair then she'll be vulnerable...I don't have anymore unicorn hairs so if we loose it that's it I can't help her anymore..."
What the hell are they talking about?
"Okay but...how am I supposed to get her to take it?"
"You could always tell Alfred the truth"
"...I don't know...Christina made me promise not to"
"What?..." I whispered to myself just before I lost my footing and pushed the door open a crack.
Shit they stopped talking they must have heard me!
Allistor opened the door and looked down at me with a frown. I looked up at him with disbelief as I glanced at Arthur who was clutching a small box in his hand. "U-uncle Allistor...please tell me it's not true" Allistors frown deepened as he placed a hand on my head and pulled me into a hug. I felt tears well up in my eyes as I began to piece everything together. Christina's fall wasn't an accident...she was still sick...she's been sick all this time and she's kept it from me...but why...why did she keep it from me?
Why did she lie?...I felt tears begin trickle down my cheeks. "Don't cry Alfred...I know you feel hurt but you have to understand...she didn't want to worry you..." Arthur had a soft and gentle tone, I could tell he was trying his best to keep me calm.
I took a deep breath and wiped my eyes before pushing Allistor away, "so to keep me from worrying...she lied about being sick...and told you instead?...that sounds like a pretty shit excuse"
"Alfred your not being fair...think about if it was you in her shoes...she was sick all that time watching you go mad from the fear of loosing her...she didn't want to see you go through that again..."
I frowned and wiped my eyes, I know I'm wrong to be mad at Christine...but I am damn it and I just...Why am I so angry? I completely understand why she lied to me and- and hell Arthur's right I would have done the same thing but...damn it I just feel so guilty...like every last happy emotion I've had since she's been in the hospital was unjustified...like I should have been at her side at the hospital instead of staying home and pretending like everything was perfectly fine and normal. Oh....I get it now...I'm not mad at Christina...I'm mad at myself.
"...Alfred...please say something I'm worried..."
Arthur bit his lip and reached towards my face with one hand, without thinking I quickly stopped him before his finger could graze my cheek. My hand is shaking...damn it. "I'm fine...I'm just tired..." I squeezed Arthur's wrist for a second before Allistor made me let go. "Alfred let's go downstairs for a sec okay laddy?..." Allistor took the box from Arthur and put his hand on my shoulder guiding me to the stairs. "Arthur why don't you go back to bed we can talk about this in the morning"
"....right..." Arthur stood and watched as I made my way downstairs with Allistor and into his Arthur's study. "....Uncle Al why are we in here"
"Because I think we should have a chat...and when we're done I'm gonna tell you how to fix yourself"
"...you mean like a therapy session"
"Yeah sure, but with booze" Allistor grabbed a bottle of whiskey from a cabinet and made me sit down next to him on the couch. "Okay Lad, take sip and tell me what you feel...don't hold back just be honest" Allistor poured me a glass of whiskey and handed it to me. I stared at it for a second and took a small sniff of it, "if I'm being honest...I really don't want to drink this..." Allistor chuckled and took a sip from his own glass, "yeah I know. But I'm not really giving you a choice here" I sighed and took a sip scrunching my face up in distaste.
"At least your calm enough to show basic emotion"
"What?...you think I'm suicidal or something?"
"Honestly? Yeah I was kinda worried you would be"
I frowned and took another sip. "Well I'm not..." Allistor gave me a look before taking a sip.
"...you know what this is gonna get dark pretty fast...so let's change it up okay? Let's play a game instead"
"A game?"
"Yeah, a drinking game. I ask you a question and you ask me a question, every time you answer a question you take a sip, every time you skip a question you down a whole glass. We play until the bottle is empty." Allistor filled each of our glasses to the top and the stench alone made my stomach churn.
"....okay fine...but I get the first question"
"Shoot" I paused and thought about my question before actually asking it.
"Do you love Francis?"
"Ouch lad...your starting off with a question like that?" Allistor took a sip and kept a cool exterior.
"Yeah I do..." he frowned and stared at the portrait on the wall for a moment before looking at me.
"When was the last time you thought about killing yourself?" I felt myself stiffen up, "Jesus you said I was being hard with the questions..." I took a sip and looked at him, "when Matt was attacked back in America...that was the last time...so a few months ago..maybe a year or so now" Allistor nodded.
"Okay...what's in that box?" Allistor chuckled and downed his entire glass without a second thought.
"I'm saving that for the end of our session.
Now my turn. Why haven't you proposed? Really"
I stared at my glass and took a sip, "because I'm scared..." "what are you scared of" I paused and looked at him, "you asked your question it's my turn." "Alright alright go ahead" I felt my face get hot from the whiskey as I conjured up my next question.
"Have you ever been in love with a human?" Allistor took a sip and looked at me not even showing a hint of emotion, "yes." He answered bluntly, "now what are you scared of?" I stared at him for a sec a little scared of his response to my question before taking a sip of whiskey. "I'm scared of hurting her...and the twins...sometimes I still get urges when I get stressed out or nervous...like my entire body goes numb and the room will go dark...It feels like I'm being eaten alive by my emotions and I don't know what to do about it...I'm scared that if I go too far I'll make an attempt on my life or cut myself and freak them out...maybe even scar them like I did Matt..."
Allistor frowned and leaned back on the couch.
"I know how you feel Alfred...I'm sorry I wish you didn't have to go through that...but...I think your just over thinking it...in fact I think if you married her and really worked on starting your family then...you'd find that those emotions that seem to be swarming you...will just...kinda go away"
"....how do you know?" Allistor took a big sip of whiskey and paused before answering me.
"Because that's what happened to me when I did exactly that..."
"You...had a family?" Allistor shook his head and tapped his glass. "It's my turn now...when we were upstairs you seemed conflicted...were you mad at Christina? Or yourself? And tell me why"
I downed my glass and held my stomach with one hand and covered my mouth with the other to keep myself from vomiting. I'm not a very heavy drinker and even when I do drink it's never hard liquor like this. "Why'd you skip?" "Because I want you to answer my previous question..." Allistor sighed and took a sip. "Yeah I had a family...I met a girl...I married her...had a kid with her...he was actually a country- well a colony...his name was Darien...and I don't want to talk about it anymore so long story short their both dead now and that's that"
"...I'm sorry...I didn't know..." Allistor nodded and took an unnecessary swig before filling our glasses back up to full. "Okay now you answer my previous question" I took a sip before answering. "Myself I guess...I just feel...guilty...but I can't really explain it well...it's like...when you're doing something dirty and like...your dead dog or an embarrassing memory from your childhood randomly comes to mind and now you feel disgusted with yourself."
"I hate that I know exactly what your talking about"
"Yeah...I feel like that right now..." I stared at my glass and sloshed it around a bit to the whiskey teeter on the edge of spilling. "So...since you still love pop...how do you feel about him getting back together with dad?..." Allistor ran his fingers through his hair and took a sip, "I can't lie...I'm pretty upset about it...because I know I'm gonna miss Francis...and I know this time those two are gonna stick it out...that's the real reason I'm upset because I know I'm not gonna have another chance to win him back..." I frowned and opened my mouth to say something but stopped when I realized it was just another question that wouldn't be answered. Allistor sighed and smiled a little, "but I'll get over it...there's plenty of fish in the sea...you know Lithuania right? He's pretty cute maybe I'll try flirting with him a bit"
"Oh so your just flipping through guys now?"
"No no, I'm very selective with who I lay with I'm not that much of a player, okay now my turn we still have some whiskey left. Are you feeling any better at all after this talk?" I took a sip and nodded wiping my mouth, "yes and no...I feel a little better mentally but physically...I think I'm gonna kill you"
"Glad to hear it laddie." Allistor downed the rest of his whiskey and belched in my face, "I think I'm done answering questions for tonight how about you?"  I nodded and stared at my glass with distaste. "Do I have to finish it?" Allistor chuckled and smirked, "finish it or I'm grabbing the scotch out of my suitcase for another round" without a second thought I chugged the glass and gagged almost loosing it for real this time. "This is why hanging out with you sucks I always get plastered" I gagged again and hiccuped holding my stomach. Allistor chuckled and grabbed the small black box from off of the coffee table. "Look Al...seriously look at me I need you to process all of this and not forget it all in the morning. I hate to repeat myself" I held my head as I became light headed from the alcohol, "could...could ya write it down maybe?..." Allistor sighed and gave me the box. "Stop being a baby, inside this box is a ring that contains unicorn inside the jewel."
".....Uncle I think I really overdid it with the whiskey I heard you say unicorn hair" Allistor flicked my forehead hard, "ow!" "I'm not kidding. This is what's gonna save your lasses life. Make sure it doesn't break and make sure she keeps it on as much as possible...it's okay if she doesn't wear it for a day but that's it only a day, every time she takes it off she'll become weaker and weaker until eventually she'll die if she takes it off for even a second. Do you understand?" I put my hand over his mouth to shut him up and pressed my head against his chest.
"I think I'm gonna vomit..." Allistor groaned and pushed my head over the side of the couch. "Don't throw up on me....your clearly not processing this so I'll just talk to you about it in the mor-" Before he could finish his sentence I ended up hurling all over the expensive looking marble floor before everything went black.

When I woke up the next day it was about 3 in the afternoon and I had a splitting headache. Neither Christina nor the twins were in the room and there was a small glass of what smelled like pickle juice and eggs on my bedside table along with a small black box with a note taped to the bottom. I sat up and grabbed my glasses from the table and put them on to read the note, wincing as my brain pounded against my skull.
"Dear Alfred, you can't hold your liquor at all lad I stayed up for over an hour cleaning up your bloody vomit. And because your American let me clarify that I mean your damn vomit not that you actually had blood in your vomit" I stopped reading and rolled my eyes, Jackass. "Anyway don't let Christina see that box. You should use it as her wedding ring so she keeps it on. I've put the reason why and instructions and shit on the back but for now I just wanted to say I'll be back in Scotland by the time you wake up so this is goodbye for now. Thanks for that terrible game last night and I'm sorry for the hangover. Speaking of which drink the stuff in the glass quickly it sucks but it helps. Love- Uncle Allie"
I took a deep breath and went over the instructions on the back of the note before chugging the wretched concoction and hiding the ring box in my drawer since I can't risk letting it break.
I got out of bed and sniffed my clothes with disgust, "Jesus no wonder Christina's not hear I smell like a boar..." I decided to take a quick shower and change my clothes before going downstairs where Francis and Arthur were both playing with the twins on the floor whilst Christina chatted with Matthew and Ailbe. I took a deep breath before adjusting my glasses and walking into the living room.
"Oh look who it is, the loudest man on the planet" Matthew snickered at me and imitated my snoring. I rubbed my eyes and flipped him off grumpily, "it's not my fault...I was with Allistor for thirty minutes and he got me plastered..." Arthur raised an eyebrow. "You were drunk? Off what? He didn't honestly give you his stash" I blushed and scratched my cheek. "Uh...if I'm being honest I don't remember where he got it...actually I don't remember a lot from last night."
"Do you remember cursing at me to get out of the bed?" Christina gave me a dirty look. I felt my fave turn pale, "o-oh my god no I don't! Babe I'm so sor-" Christina broke into a fit of laughter and got up and held my hands, "I'm kidding I'm kidding! Oh I'm sorry it was Allistors idea, he carried you to bed last night since you were out cold" I felt my face turn red as I buried my face in her shoulder to hide my shame. "I'm never touching alcohol again..." Everyone got a good crack out of Christina's joke, especially Matthew who was wheezing like a dog; which suddenly remind me of something. I stood up and grinned an evil grin towards Matthew and leaned against the wall dramatically, "m-maple!~ oh maple!~" I moaned out loud imitating Matt making everyone in the room stare at Ailbe and Matt. Ailbe buried his face in his hands, even he was cracking up a little through his embarrassment, Matt was furious. "YOU HEARD THAT!? OH MY GOD ALFRED I'LL KILL YOU" Matthew jumped up off the couch and shook my around wildly. Francis was laughing like the pervert he is and Arthur was trying his best to act like an ashamed parent but he too was laughing up a storm. Christina was hiding her giggles from behind her hand whilst trying to get Matthew to calm down. Ah...this feels good...I think Allistor was right...I just need to focus on building my family up again...then maybe things will be better.