"remember how I'd fly to you?"
( 𝐅𝐀𝐋𝐒𝐄 𝐆𝐎𝐃 )
❛ two broken people
trying to heal eachother,
that's love ❜
in which two very broken souls find each other and try to put...
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One for the money, two for the show I never was ready, so I watch you go Sometimes you just don't know the answer 'Til someone's on their knees and asks you
❛ ━━━━━━･❪ ✷ ❫ ･━━━━━━ ❜
CAS WOKE WITH THE SUN IN HER eyes and raised her hand to close the curtain. She was met with an ear-splitting headache and dropped her hand. Loki had an arm around her waist, his face placed in the crook of her neck.
She really needed to go back to the underworld. She hated it there, dark and dreary, but she still needed to go. Asgard was slowly killing her. It was simply put.
"If you really need to go back that badly," Loki murmured, his voice thick with exhaustion. "then do it."
Cas sighed, feeling him adjust and wave his hand to close the curtain himself.
"Your thoughts are loud this early in the morning," He grumbled.
"I'm sorry," Cas said, closing her eyes again. Loki moved as if he would be sleeping again, and Cas tried, but her mind was moving too fast.
"Cas," Loki sighed, moving back from where he was, rolling onto his back. "if you are struggling that much. you should go."
"I hate it there," Cas said, rolling over and resting her head on her hand, her elbow placed on the pillow beside Loki's head. "mostly it's my father." She sighed, pausing for a few moments. "But, if I go after Thor's coronation my mother would be back."
"mm," Loki said, his eyes closed. "now can you sleep?"
"yes," Cas sighed reluctantly, laying back down. She quieted her thoughts and lay there, looking at the ceiling until Loki was ready to get up, and Cas did her best to not bother him.
Eventually, she climbed out of bed and walked outside, the wooden balcony outside of Loki's room she'd light on Asgard's beautiful views. not only the city but the mountains past it. Cas inhaled soft morning air.
She leaned against the golden banister, looking out amongst the people and the city, quietly bustling lung on its own. it was nice to see a sense of normalcy while her mind was falling apart with the decision.
She really didn't want to leave.
Cas sighed. she knew it had to be done, she knew it was the right decision. it was just a matter of convincing herself to leave. She would leave after thor became king. it wasn't a big deal in any way. but she would have to leave Loki. she would have to leave the only place she ever felt at home. Loki couldn't survive a day in the underworld, much less three weeks (which would be more than a year Midgard time).
Loki joined her after a little while, wrapping his arms around her waist and resting his chin on her shoulder. she closed her eyes and played with his hair with a hand.
"Good morning, my love," Loki murmured. Cas smiled, letting out a small puff of air from her nose.
"How did you sleep?" Cas asked.
"pretty good," Loki said.
they stood outside quietly for a while, the air between them thick with what was to come, at least for Cas. she really didn't want to leave him. And only time would tell that leaving him wasn't the best idea.
❛ ━━━━━━･❪ ✷ ❫ ･━━━━━━ ❜
IVORY WAX DRIPPED ONTO THE EDGE of a while envelope edged with gold leaf. it was there to hold a flower in place as she stamped it. it was a beautiful bronze stamp, a C in the center. it was a gift from her aunt who gave it to her the first time she left the underworld.
Cas walked from her desk after labeling the envelope to make it easier for Hermes and Heimdal to deliver the message to her parents. As much as Cas despised her father, she still wanted to warn him she was coming.
She poked her head into Loki's room, the envelope in her hand. "I'm going down to the Bifrost," she held up the letter "if you wanted to come."
Loki nodded wordlessly and pushed himself away from his desk, discarding whatever he was doing. he walked to her side as they walked further through Asgard in silence. it was the same silence that only comes when two people understand each other, and Cas and Loki understood each other better than anyone. When they exited the castle, Cas laced her fingers with Loki's as the silence continued.
"you're really leaving?" Loki asked. Cas wrinkled her nose and nodded.
"I have to. I don't want to, but I might die if I stay here any longer." She really wished she didn't need to, that she could stay on Asgard with Loki, but things had to be done.
Loki nodded, and the two of them walked down to the Bifrost in silence.
Heimdal, Frigga, and Loki were the only ones on Asgard who knew. Heimdal was all-seeing so he knew by association, and gladly delivered letters for Cas.
"Good morning Heimdal," Cas said, walking into the Bifrost room. she smiled softly. Loki said he'd wait outside.
"Cas. how are you today?" Heimdal said with a nod.
"I'm pretty good. could you deliver this to Hermes for me?" She held out the letter for Heimdal to take.
"of course," He said. "so you're going back?"
"afraid so," Cas said. "It's been a long time. I don't think I've ever gone this long."
"it has been," Heimdal chuckled.
"Thank you," Cas said with a tight-lipped smile. "have a good day."
"you too."
Cas walked back to Loki, who smiled softly as they began walking back to the castle. they didn't say anything. the silence was flogged with what was to come.
❛ ━━━━━━･❪ ✷ ❫ ･━━━━━━ ❜
AUTHOR SPEAKS!
Heimdal and Cas is a friendship I didn't know I needed but here we are anyway
