Part 17

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I lay on a cot in a cabin Inej and I are sharing. She has been asleep for about an hour. Not sure how she can sleep while Nina is making so much noise in the other room. 

I feel bad for her. Having to take jurda parem just to save our lives. It was a reckless decision, but one that I respect. One that I would've done for everyone.

I roll onto my left side, my gaze landing on the only light source. Inej was going to blow out the light, but I asked her to keep it on. She didn't seem to mind. A part of me thinks that she was relieved that I asked her to keep the light on.

The fire dances back and forth from the small gusts of air that swish around the room. My eyes slowly fall closed, but I force them to stay open. I need to keep my mind awake. I need to stay focused until my feet touch land.

Land. The icy forests of Fjerda's border. The only exit that can safely get the Grisha over the border without the issue of being caught by Drüskelle every time. Alev leading the way through the trees. Ignoring everything and everyone.

"What happened to him?" a Grisha woman asks me.

"Oh him?" I nod towards Alev. "That's just how he acts."

"Keep your eyes open," Alev says from the front of the group. 

I shrug my shoulders and the Grisha woman and walk a little faster to catch up with Alev.

"You're freaking everyone out. You need to calm down."

"Don't tell me what to do, Nox."

"Alev, knock it off. I never stole anything from you. I got my position because I showed Barge that I can handle the pressure. Probably thought I could loosen you up too. You're so stubborn that you haven't realized that we have been heading in the wrong direction for five minutes!"

Alev stops in his tracks, looking around the surrounding area. I already knew he wasn't going to enjoy the fact that I helped point out his mistakes, but we need to get back as soon as possible. Barge isn't going to be happy if we are late moving to our next safe point.

"Fine," Alev states. "If you're so headstrong about working as a team, lead us to our contacts in Ravka."

I shake the anger out of my head. 
Don't show them anything is wrong. Get to the meeting spot and lead them to safety. 

I wave them on to follow me and head in the right direction.

When we get to our meeting spot. The Grisha thanked us. Their hearts are full of thanks and pride for us. 

We saved another group from being prosecuted. Always a good day when things go smoothly.

"Good job," Alev says after an hour of walking.

"Did I hear you correctly? Did the almighty Alev just praise me?"

"Go inflate your ego. I was just stating a fact. You were able to not let your feelings lead your feet."

"If your feelings were leading your feet, where were you headed?"

"Home? I'm not entirely sure. You just reminded me of a friend I used to have."

"Used?"

"She died."

"I'm so sorry, Alev."

"It's not like you haven't lost people. You move forward. Nothing can bring a dead person back."

The rest of the way back was silent. Of course I've lost people. My mother and father for starters. Both died from those Grisha attacks. I still have Matthias, but after he found out about what I was doing he distanced himself. Didn't want to be near someone who was committing treason.

I miss him. It's been a month since I've seen him. I hope he is doing alright and striving as a Drüskelle.

"Do you smell that?" Alev puts a hand out to stop me.

The smell of wood burning enters my nose. I look around the forest, trying to find the threat. Both of us are silent, waiting for someone or something to make a noise.

A horrific thought enters my brain. I look at Alev, he seems to have the same thought. 

"Could it be-"

Before I could finish the sentence, Alev grabs my arm and we run towards the post. The place that was supposed to be hidden away from everyone. No one but Barge, Alev, Tyse, and I know where this post is.
As we get closer, flames burn through the small post. 

I look around the wooded area. There has to be someone here. A Fjerdan who found the post and was ordered to destroy it, or Barge and Tyse getting away. 

Nothing.

"We need to get out of here," Alev said.

I nod. We turn to leave when I hear pounding and screaming coming from behind the door. They are locked inside. 

Taking off running, I only have one thought. Save them. 

Being burned alive doesn't seem like a great way to go. How did a fire even start here? As far as I know we don't have anything that could start a fire. Too much of a hazard and risk of being sought after.

I felt a pair of arms wrap around my stomach and jerk me backwards. Struggling to get free, the arms just wrap tighter.

"Let go, Alev!" I scream at him. The banging on the door is getting louder.

"You're not going to kill yourself! They are as good as gone."

"Not yet, we have time." 

In that moment the post exploded. Alev and I go flying back, falling on the ground with a thud. Fire was still blazing. It's not going to stop for a while. Not while there is still wood to burn.

Bodies to burn...

I wake with a gasp. Within seconds I noticed Inej at my side. That woman is so quiet it almost seems impossible.

"It's okay," Inej whispers to me. "You'll be alright. They can't hurt you anymore."

At least she doesn't know exactly what I was dreaming about. Guess I can consider that a win. 

I smile and nod before telling Inej I'm going to get some air. Luckily she was very kind about it.

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