My Wedding Planner [BRIGHTWIN]

chapter 1

Tine has read once that there comes a moment in everybody's life (moments, in case of Tine) when they question their existence and no, not because they have some sort of intellectual appetite but they  genuinely get amazed by the extremeties of jokes life throws on them. This is one such moment - Earth kneeling down and holding a ring, looking smugly at Tine as if he knows for a fact that Tine would anything but reject his proposal. Of course, he is right. What he is not right about is in thinking this marriage could ever become some beautiful decision they both are making out of love because it will always be one of those infinite things imposed on Tine. He knew this day would come. He just wished he could postpone it as much as it could be.

"Tine?"

"Huh?"

"Say yes already" Earth says, half laughing, "my knees are hurting."

Tine wishes Earth could realise the same about his pride. What part of 'I can't see you like that' is so hard to understand, he thinks. And what part of 'I don't want to get married dad' is so difficult to interpret? Tine recalls the day when his dad introduced him to Earth Pirapat, son of his good friend (and head of the company collaborating with his dad's) on a simple family lunch, saying they should get along well. Tine had known what getting along meant. He knew by the look on his dad's face - the look that says I give you one last chance to be a good son so marry this guy even though he eats like a porcupine. Six months was all he got to fall in love, not the best treatment to a guy who fantasizes about romance and weddings like thirteen year old girls fantasize about their English teachers - with stupidly impossible, embarassing  but beautiful hopes.

"Earth.." he says, not sure if his words are gonna change anything, "don't you think it's too soon?"

"Too soon?" Earth frowns, "this is perfect timing, for all I know. I've been courting you for six months already."

"But.."

"I don't think I can wait anymore babe." Earth says smiling.

Tine concludes Mr. Pirapat and his dad can't wait anymore. So that was what they were talking about with Earth at lunch yesterday. Tine stands still, unable to find a way out of this helplessness. Something inside him reminds him if not today, he will have to accept the proposal next week or may be next but that's all the freedom and time he'll get. And so he does other thing that he thinks might make it easy- trying to list out good things coming out of this arranged marriage.

Nothing for him. May be, something for Earth. A lot for Tine's dad. He sighs.

"Okay" he says, feigning a smile that he doesn't even bother to stretch at least as much to convince Earth that he was genuinely happy. He wonders if Earth would even understand.

"I knew it!" Earth says, getting up and embracing Tine like his favorite team has won the match. Tine doesn't even know which football team is Earth's favourite. Does he even like football? Tine dreads to think how is he going to survive. May be he should try talking to Earth again. He hopes, against all previous experiences, that Earth would understand him.

"I'm so happy we're finally going to get married. I'll call dad..."

Tine nods. So Earth won't, like always. Tine touches the ring in his finger and hears a hundred big and small, calm and panicked, wise and stupid, all kinds of voices in his head that are saying the same thing - you see that window? Jump before it's late. Or may be... You feel the cellphone in your jeans? Call your dad and fucking speak. Or perhaps...you know your fiancé? Tell him that...or may be don't. He won't understand anyways.

The voices are loud and urgent but Tine is not confused. He is not because no matter how loud they are, they are overlapped by Earth's voice as he speaks to his father on the phone, "dad, Tine said yes."

Yes, Tine thinks. Yes, I did..except I didn't want to.

.....

"I can't believe you said yes! What were you thinking?"

Tine is holding his head between his knees as Pear paces back and forth in his room, with her hands on her hips, like a typical sister should do when her brother makes the stupidest decision of his life. Fong is sitting cross legged on the bed, staring judgingly at Tine.

"He googled a poem he could propose to me with" Tine says in a monotone, "how could I not be touched."

"Tell me it was not the poem he recited on his parents' anniversary."

Tine looks at Fong as he asks. Fong rolls his eyes.

"I can't believe this is happening. I'm just 26. I am yet to experience everything I wanted before getting married and I don't even love the guy I'm gonna marry. This sucks. This totally sucks."

"And you won't get to fool around anymore, which you haven't done in six months anyway."

Tine throws the pillow at Fong and huffs in annoyance. He is right. Tine will no longer be the guy who can hang out late at bars, sleep with hot men, have fun. Not that he despises commitment. Hell, if anybody wants commitment, it is Tine. It's just that the version he wanted (still does) is entirely different from what he is getting. A thrilling, true lifetime forever love versus a passive, business arrangement. It is not worth sacrificing his singlehood for.

"Can we not talk about it now?" Tine pleads. Pear nods and sits beside him, taking his hands into her and telling him that he will be fine. Fong jumps onto them too, before getting beaten by Pear for ruining her dress.

"Do you guys wanna come?" She asks.

Fong refuses, saying he has some files to analyze. Tine says he would go sleep but changes his mind when Pear gives him a mind mapping of how his life is going to change the moment they leave for their home tomorrow so the best he can do is to enjoy the night while it lasts. She makes him believe he deserves at least that much. He doesn't know much about deserving and bullshit. Does that even work in real life, he always wonders. Right now, he knows he needs it more than ever. One night when he could let everything go. One night where the darkness won't bother him like burdens of daylight do. One night of grabbing his life by its neck and dancing the hell out of it. One night of catharsis. Pear stops him saying he might be taking it more seriously than needed. Tine rolls his eyes. Give him some mercy, he's getting married for god's sake.

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