rewrite the stars - jaywon

chapter 28

from: sunghoon

tomorrow

after school

Jungwon felt his heart thud. He looked up from his phone, not daring to do more than flick his eyes up. His parents seemed to be paying closer attention to him, after his outburst at them and subsequent disappearance. Any sudden movements or suspect actions would bring their questioning back.

They'd ask him how he was doing, like they weren't the ones that had made him feel awful to begin with. They'd reiterate that they'd done it for Jungwon's sake, like they actually believed Jungwon might come to see it as a good thing that they'd gone and erased Jay.

Jungwon held his breath, and chanced a glance at the robot. Jay was hard at work, as he had been for the past couple days, all without break. He was crouched over, behind the TV, installing some upgrade Jungwon's father had confessed that Jensen had gotten installed first.

Jungwon knew, if he could see Jay's face, there would be nothing beyond his features there. Just a blank slate, no spark of recognition, no smile for Jungwon. Jungwon inhaled unevenly, and turned his eyes back to his phone.

to: sunghoon

got it. thanks

⭐

"Hey, you're driving me today," Jungwon tossed his keys to Jay. The robot caught them without flinching, face unchanging.

Jungwon needed an excuse for Jay to come to him after school. He knew this. It still hurts, having to share his usual ritual ride with this Jay. It felt like the blank 'bot was treading on hallowed ground, taking part in something special, something that had been just for Jungwon and Jungwon's Jay alone.

But Jungwon had to swallow his irrational desires to keep the rides to himself. He needed this Jay to intrude a little, if he was going to get his Jay back.

Without responding, the blank Jay immediately began to put away the food he was preparing. Without even turning Jungwon's way once, he started towards the garage.

"Impatient, are we?" Jungwon's mouth twisted into a wry smile as he watched the 'bot move to his car, knowing full well his quip wouldn't garner a reply.

⭐

Jungwon couldn't stand awkward silences. No matter the occasion, no matter the company, he'd always endeavored to avoid them. He'd crack a joke, or he'd make a fool out of himself. Hell, he'd even burst into random applause in a silent classroom, just to avoid that awkward, suffocating tension.

And it was suffocating, Jungwon thought. That wasn't an exaggeration. He glanced at Jay out of the corner of his eye, and had to keep regulating his breathing so his inhalations and exhalations came as and when they should.

Jay hadn't looked his way once. Hadn't said one thing. He was making great time, driving faster and taking shortcuts the other Jay never had. It was forcing Jungwon to reconsider just how efficient the pre-erased Jay had been trying to be. If he could have made the rides shorter but hadn't, that meant he'd intentionally drawn them out.

Jungwon reminded himself once more to breathe normally, as his heart ached. As if normal breathing could alleviate the pain in his chest. Jay had been trying to spend more time with him, from the very start.

And it was only now that he was trying to get his time spent with Jungwon over with as soon as physically possible that Jungwon realized it.

Jungwon eyed the blank-faced Jay, "I'm gonna turn on some music. Tell me if you're not okay with that."

Jay, of course, said nothing. He nodded, in acknowledgement that his master had spoken. Jungwon didn't hold back his disappointed sigh as he reached forward to start the radio. He paused, upon seeing his recently played tracks.

With a quaking finger, Jungwon selected an old song. He watched Jay carefully for a reaction as he drew back to his seat.

Even before Bazzi came in speaking, even when it was just the instrumental intro to the song, Jay's eyes started flashing. They lit up, faintly lit from within. Jungwon watched them flash with bated breath, unsure what he'd done, whether he should have done it at all. Whether this was a good thing.

Then, the words started. Jay shook his head, as if trying to clear something from it. His eyes stayed lit up, flickering, strobing opalescent sharded light. He took his eyes from the road for the first time, and Jungwon felt that thing within him take flight.

Jay looked from the car's display, of the song title, to Jungwon. Jungwon tried not to get his hopes up, but his thoughts were just a string of one word repeated over and over.

remember, remember, remember, remember, remember –

"Can you select a different song?" Jay asked, his voice toneless as ever, "This one appears to be causing a malfunction in my systems."

Jungwon felt his stomach bottom out. He nodded, jerkily. Hand shaking, he reached forward to pick something new. A recent song, something Jay definitely wouldn't have heard before. Jungwon bit his lip hard enough to feel a sharp pain, as Jay turned his dark eyes back to the road ahead.

As much as he wanted Jay to remember, Jungwon didn't want to risk hurting him to do it.

— the end of chapter 28 ♡