rewrite the stars - jaywon

chapter 41

"Yes," Jay intoned, "You make me feel, Jungwon-- yes, scared, but so much more than that. I look at you, and I'm filled with contradicting sensations. I feel fortunate beyond belief because, out of everyone in the world, I was sent to you. But I feel a pain that's almost physical, because I know we can never be more than we are now. It doesn't make sense, how you have the singular ability to make me so... so happy and so sad, all at once."

Jungwon's mind raced to keep up with Jay's confession, everything Jungwon apparently meant to him.

"Why can't we be more than friends?" he blurted out, still in the midst of processing.

Jay blinked, as though Jungwon had taken him by surprise.

"I like you too," Jungwon felt winded, as though he'd run a million miles, "And, honestly, I don't give a shit about whether or not I'm supposed to. So," Jungwon locked eyes with Jay, and didn't look away, "Why can't we be more?"

Jay blinked, again. He was starting to smile, too, though it was still uncertain.

"Your parents--," Jay began, and Jungwon felt a spike of panic.

His parents scared him, because of what they had done to Jay, what they could do again to him. But, one thing was for sure: Jungwon didn't care at all what they thought.

"Fuck them."

Jungwon listed forward. He raised his hand from Jay's shoulder, carding his fingers through Jay's hair. He angled Jay's head forward and just like that, their foreheads gently bumped together.

Jay's hair was soft in between his fingers, and soft where it fell into his face.

"You and me, Jay. When it comes to us, nobody's thoughts matter but yours and mine."

"Oh," Jungwon felt a light touch as Jay's hand came up to the juncture of his neck and jaw, "Okay."

"Okay?" Jungwon laughed, slightly giddy, feeling overwhelmed.

Not only had Jay been returned to him, but Jay apparently liked him back. Had maybe even liked him for a while. He started to draw back. Now only one thing stood between him and Jay. Or, rather, a couple.

"I guess now we have to figure out how to get my parents to let you--."

Jungwon's words were lost in the ether, as Jay moved. Jay tilted his head, angled Jungwon's jaw, and leaned in. Jay drew closer and closer, his eyes sliding shut, until Jungwon could practically feel the heat radiating from him.

Jungwon just barely buried the surprised 'Oh' that threatened to slip from him.

"Wait, just... " as Jay spoke, Jungwon could feel his lips moving. They brushed up Jungwon's as words dropped from them, setting the nerve endings there alight, "...before we worry about that, would you allow me...?"

Like sparks, like static electricity, the barest contact made Jungwon feel as if he'd been shocked. Jungwon's eyes fluttered shut, in anticipation.

"Yes," he exhaled.

And, as though he'd been waiting for Jungwon's say-so, Jay shifted. Jay's lips were only on Jungwon's for the briefest moment, not even the span of a single beat of Jungwon's hammering heart. Then, he was pulling away, leaving Jungwon wanting.

That had barely been anything, could barely be termed a kiss.

Jungwon chased Jay as he withdrew, trying to recapture his lips, to no avail. Jay held him back. As if in apology, he stroked the length of Jungwon's jaw with his thumb.

"God, you're a tease," Jungwon's voice was shaky, as he reopened his eyes. He felt thoroughly, embarrassingly unravelled. And all it had taken was one not-kiss.

"Trust me, you've done your fair share of being a tease too," to Jungwon's relief, Jay sounded just as wrecked as him.

He looked beyond Jungwon, and Jungwon followed his gaze. The older boys were huddled around a street light a hundred yards away, all of them suspiciously turned away.

"Ah," Jungwon said, as the reality of their situation came rushing back in.

Jungwon raised his hand, to press his fingertips to his lips. They still tingled. He glanced at Jay, curious if he'd simply imagined the electrical shocks or if they had actually occurred.

Jay's hand slipped off of him, leaving the area feeling too cold, bereft, in its wake.

"Let's go home, Jungwonie. We'll figure out the rest when we get there."

— the end of chapter 41♡

im so sorry for the late update. i just got home from school :((

ANYWAYS JAYWON KISSING SCENE !!! i bet you guys want more of it lol (same tho 😔✋🏻)

i will update again after this reaches 650 votes ^_^