fragments of my life [MERDER]

TWELVE

The visit of Derek's mother had helped him, slightly. Enough, Derek thought, it had been enough of a wake up call for him. His mother always had that power to realise what he needed, and how he truly felt, as hard as he tried to mask it. He'd started believing in therapy, and it began to help, began to have an effect. He'd started to smile again, he'd started to be a brilliant surgeon again, he'd started to believe again. The light, the glimmer, that Meredith brought to his crystal orbs however, was still absent. Dr. Wyatt had helped him realise how much he needed Meredith, and they had attempted to brainstorm ideas to help Meredith to trust him again, to give him a second choice. Dr. Wyatt reminded Derek that this was all down to Meredith, down to her to decide to let him back into her heart after he so cruelly broke it last time, but Derek had hope that she would. He knew his wife, he thought. He knew she would come back to him, eventually.

That fact didn't stop Derek from pestering Richard. His mother had let it slip that Richard knew her location, nothing more than that, but he still knew something, and had kept it from him. 

"Derek, if you're here-" Richard began, but he was almost immediately stopped by Derek.

"About my wife? Yes, I am." Derek stood, cracking his neck as he glared down Richard.

"I'm not telling you where she is, Derek." Richard grunted, turning his attention back to the paperwork on his desk.

"Why not? She's my wife. I deserve to know, Richard." Derek whined out, and Richard simply rolled his eyes.

"You know, Derek. You are not the only person that loves Meredith. Yet you are the only one who has been in my office badgering me about it." Richard sighed, barely looking at Derek.

"Just tell me where she is, and I'll stop. Simple really." Derek looked at Richard, pleading, "Please."

"I'm not going to do that, Derek. She is the closest thing I have to a daughter. She trusted me with this information, and I won't tell you anything, not unless she wanted me to, which she does not. Yes, I know where she is. I know she is alive, I called the Chief over there and he assured me that she was fine. Why can't you just let her have her space, Derek? Her friends are giving her space, her sister can give her space, her person can give her space. I know you are her husband Derek, but you need to give her her space." Richard sighed again, looking up with Derek with a tinge of disappointment visible in his eyes.

"Richard." Derek let a breath escape from his lips, looking downwards.

"Derek. You need to stop badgering me, and start doing something else. I'm not going to tell you a thing, Derek. You should focus this energy into something else." Richard half spat, Derek's incessant begging and pleading beginning to get on his final nerves. 

"Like what? I have nothing without Meredith!" Derek whined, looking up at Richard.

"You... you are so irritating, Derek. Everyone in your life is telling you the same thing and you're not getting it." Richard growled, and Derek was immediately taken aback by his attitude and tone.

"You're not getting it, Derek. You need to stop fighting Karev, blaming people, pestering her friends and family,  and start figuring out how you're going to make it up to her. For gods sake, Derek, you need to put some effort into this one. You screwed up, bad, and we all know it. The bigger the mistake, the bigger the action of the apology. This is going to be like the long con, Derek. You're going to need to find some kind of way, and work at it until Meredith decides that she's stable enough to let you back in. She will, Derek. Trust me on that."

"How am I supposed to do that, Richard?"

"Trust your wife? You're really one to talk about trust here, Derek."