The Unpublished Poems

~guilty~

I don't understand 

Happiness n a moment 

Crashing down before your very eyes 

Screaming out but no one seems to hear 

And guilty 

So guilty

What did I do? 

Oh, but don't you rememember? 

Looking, looking, looking 

Hoping hoping hoping 

Wake up now 

Throw off sleep now 

Time to face the day 

Time to fall apart 

Do it or don't, 

Everything seems like a chore 

Who you are is who you are 

Life never was meant to be easy 

I think it hurts but I can't tell 

Seems as though it all went numb some time ago 

No, I'm not okay 

I never was, you see, 

This is the honest truth, 

Look under the surface, 

And you'll see quite clearly, 

Nothing is as it should be 

Everything's still the same 

And oh, I'm tired, 

Tired of the same old nothing 

Feigned enthusiasm, 

No interest 

Losing track of days

Weeks 

Months 

Years 

Fine, guess this is where I am 

Cna't change a thing, 

Can't make make myself perfect 

Whatever that is 

Seems like from the beginning 

I didn't understand 

What or why or how 

Friends come and go 

Watching them disappear 

Unable still 

To open up-

No, you don't get to know 

Pay attention now, 

Don't you remember,

No, you don't, 

Falling through the cracks, 

I don't even believe 

Anyone ever saw 

Goodbye pain, 

Guilty guilty guilty 

Coping-

More afraid 

Too afraid to move...

Guilty

In a stolen crown 

And a faded soul, 

Guilty 

Of the same 

Crime 

\\\\\\\\\\\\\\

Not completely sure of my mindset when I wrote this. Anyway my fingers hurt now-I typed 26 parts up today just for poetry...:)))

-🌌