it was only a kiss // noah schnapp

022

noah's pov

cece <3

um noah
9:27
noah?
9:29
wtf is wrong with you
9:35
are u going to fucking answer?
9:42

cece what?
are u okay?
is everything okay?

no noah, i'm not okay, everything is not okay. it was only a kiss?
only a fucking kiss?

omg cecilia, i didn't mean it, i only said it because i panicked

you panicked?
i've never heard a worse excuse

what?

i dont understand, you told me you were going to ask me to be your girlfriend, we kissed again after the first one? am i just a girl for you to toy with her feelings? why'd you do this

i panicked cecilia, i told you, if you don't believe me, that's on you. but if it was only a kiss i wouldn't have done it again, i wouldn't have told you i wanted us to date. i wouldn't tell all my friends i'm in love with my best friend. but i do all those things. for you. so you still think i'm lying?

noah it's whatever, i need a break. i don't get how you could just so aimlessly say that. panicked or not. maybe you're embarrassed about the kiss. maybe you really didn't panic, it's still so upsetting. and yeah, i'm in love with my best friend too. but right now i want nothing to do with him.

cecilia
read 10:08
cecilia
read 10:09
please
read 10:11
fucking hell cece
read 10:15
i'm so sorry
read 10:18
cece come on
read 10:25

what have i done, i know i can't fix it, and she needs her space, but i have to tell someone. i dont know what i'm supposed to do. i facetimed finn, i figured he'd listen.

finn is bold
noah is italics

hey finn

hey noah what's up

i've fucked things up with cece

yeah i know
i was waiting for this call, i saw what you said in your interview

i dont know what i'm supposed to do, what if she never talks to me again

well noah, i mean you completely down played whatever you guys have going on, and obviously to her it was a big deal

how do i make it better

just let her heal on her own time, don't push it

we talked for another hour. after we hung up i just laid in my bed, i didn't sleep much. i cried last night too, for the first time in ages. i haven't told mom or chloe or dad what's happened, i think chloe is going to be the most upset with me. i started texting her on may 31, its the only thing i could think to do.

cece <3

tue, may 31, 3:44pm

hey cece, worried about u
read 3:44