How I am getting Through a break-up

Chapter- 14

I honestly do not even remember what I felt at the time, I tried to hide it, but we were making reels for time pass and I just didn't feel like, the 2-3 we tried after, there was no energy in me, and LUCKILY, even my best friend said "Listen I have no energy to do these now." So I said YA SAME. We stopped, and I was so glad. I was there in my own zone ish. I tried to focus on what she said and told me to do , but I couldn't. I wasn't planning to tell her or anyone, like I said before, but It was after 2 am, I was vulnerable, upset and my best friend was right there, I had to. So I told her, after we did our face masks, she wasn't even rude about it, I kind of felt better after telling her. I told her like 90%. My next step was to see if the best friend of his that I like still follows me or not, she does, I was glad. Then I checked if he followed my best friend and the girl from the other city, he did. So I don't know entirely why he did it. A couple reasons are as follows:

1) He couldn't stand seeing me happy/ moving on, it hurt him ish

2) He saw that I was back in touch with the dude he hated and told me to cut off(I REALLY TRIED TO PREVENT IT, but the girl I went to lunch with posted stories like an idiot, and the guy commented on my posts.

3) He knew he had hurt me enough, and initially as a friend, he tried being there for me during the break up, but realised he shouldn't come in the way of me moving on and wants me to move on happily.

4) His girlfriend doesn't want him following me

Ya so these are the few reasons. Then we slept. So after that, in the morning, we had such a good best friend time, talking about things and I don't even know, it was refreshing and something that we both needed at the time. I left by like 12, and then wanted to come home and see the Netflix activity thing, because I hadn't carried my laptop there. Unfortunately, on 7th august it does show his city, and 8th august(That is today-a Sunday) has no activity. Yeah, no, he is still there. I saw 8th august and it all shows his city.

I know this might sound weird but this just came to my mind. I think 28th august is the day...

I am going to message him on that day come what may. Whether he is here or there.

Okay this is weird but, it struck me. So the same way I want to talk to him before his birthday and all, maybe he is going to extend his stay there until his birthday because he wants to spend his birthday with his girlfriend. It is completely possible.

Why does so much have to happen to ME?!?!?! So today I went to meet the UK friend of mine, who came down after 3 years. Another friend who is only free on Sundays cause we works came too. Now we were all a group of childhood friends, But very recently, One of the guys, used me, friends with benefits, ghosted, etc etc, it wasn't nice, and didn't even bother contacting me. Only after I told our mutual friends the reason I wanted to avoid him, when he called toapologise, but I didn't pick it up.So today I met him for the first time because of all this. I did tell my UK friend all this, she knew I din't want to, but we couldn't do much, the other guy practically dragged us. After the meet, the guy who I had cut off for his behavior, told me he wanted to talk to me in person, and apologized and stuff, and SO many emotions, feelings I don't know, after last nights stuff with my ex, me literally being in my ex's area while I was with these people, plus tension with this guy before he apologised. It was all so much. Not that I have feelings for the guy, my ex was the one who convinced me to cut him off, speak up, etc etc. I don't entirely know how to express all this. It was all too much to take in a day. I did tell him I forgive him, said friends and shit, but tit was sudden and brief as I was late and didn't know what to say or do, it was so unexpected.

So I came home and was having dinner, my parents usually sit together and watch these dance shows, so one was going on, and it was a really really emotional act, and the song and all in general was very sappy, I ended up crying. Like not howling, but you know, tears wouldn't stop coming.