Amanita: Poison Shot

Chapter 109: Kono's Lies

*Note: if you're reading this chapter now as a standalone and haven't read the previous one, please read the notes on chapter 108. Thank you.

For the first time in forever, not a soul uttered a cry of victory in the Sports Palace when a match ended. There wasn't any cry of defeat either. In fact, not even the sound of breathing could be heard.

No team had ever been expelled from the cup. Nobody moved or said anything for some painfully long seconds.

Kono's teammates and coach shied away from her, awkwardly taking some steps backwards. Their faces displayed concern and shame.

"Kono, are you alright?" I whispered to her, breaking the silence.

Kono's former teammates from the Shell team stood up in the stands. They remained standing for a few dreadful seconds while making stern faces. Their eyes were shot wide in amazement. Kono and I were staring back at them, waiting for them to say something. However, they turned their backs on us and left the premises.

"Wait!" Kono exclaimed, raising a hand as if she didn't want them to leave. She had a sad and panic-stricken expression on her face. I was shocked at their lack of empathy and understanding.

It was then that I started to hear murmurs coming from the rest of the audience.

Kono started trembling and sweating. Her eyes were unfocused again, and she was getting pale while she kept staring at the audience in an agitated manner. I heard swearwords and insults uttered in disdainful whispers, while I saw some members of the audience simply too shocked to say anything at all.

All that pejorative attention bestowed upon her must have felt overwhelming. Her mouth opened, but she couldn't speak. She held her chest with a hand as if she felt pain. Her breaths came short and ragged, and her nostrils were flared. She was having a panic attack.

"I..." she managed to say but stopped. She was on the verge of tears, as well.

I heard someone skating to us slowly, gently. It was Sigi. He knelt beside me.

"Kono..." I whispered to her with all the love in the world as I knelt a bit closer to her and holding one of her hands. "Can you hear me?"

"I'm so sorry, K... This is my fault," Sigi whispered with regret.

Kono's facial expression contorted to one of suffering and unbearable sadness. I held her hand tighter in my hands.

"I... I lied," she said loudly for all the people to hear, but with a creaky voice. "I know I lied. To all of you." Everybody fell silent then. "But I'm not ashamed. You have to understand. It's who I am."

"What are you talking about?" I softly asked her.

"I've always loved hockey. More than my girl friends at school. A lot more. I wanted to play... so badly. The boys in my school never let me play. I used to play at home all alone. I even dressed up and pretended I was a pro.

"When my parents found it out, they told me off. That was a men's sport. What was I doing? Did I want to be a freak?, they told me as if I were insane. I was eight at the time. I said it made no sense to let boys play and not girls. What was their answer? I got slapped.

"They took me to the BioSolutions Centre. My parents were horrified when the doctors told them I had 'impure thoughts' about... identifying as a male. And liking women. My father... my father asked if they would euthanise me."

That verb had the power for making everybody feel guilty. I got pale. Sigi, too.

"The clone doctors said that they didn't care. They laughed it off. The three of us were terrified. They didn't give a fuck about hockey, my feelings, anything about me, of course. They said that for as long as I followed their commands as a female, I'd be safe. There was no need to kill me if I promised to get married and have children like any other female traditional human.