Guardian: FIGHT! FIGHT! FI-
Miles: by "fight", do you include yourself?
Guardian: uh, yes? 😐
Miles: ... No
Guardian: huh-
Miles: you're kinda important so we need you alive.
Guardian: fuck you.
Miles: HEY DUTCH!
Dutch: ye?
Miles: take this loser back go the base
Dutch: gotcha *picks up Guardian*
Guardian: ill kill you for this sergeant
Conor: bye bye Walten :D
Guardian: THATS NOT MY NAME-
Later
Dutch and Guardian: *riding in a helicopter*
Guardian: ... I miss my camera
Dutch: suck it up
Guardian: ... I miss my chainsaw
Dutch: suck it up-
Later
Dutch and Guardian: *approaching military base*
Soldier: STOP! You violated the law! Pay the court a fine or serve your sentence! Your stolen goods are now profit!
Dutch: bitch stfu it's me
Soldier: aw :{
In the base
Dutch: *talking with Guardian* yeah you can even meet the captain.
Guardian: I don't give no shit about no dam captain
Dutch: and you can even meet Lenny
Guardian: what kinda bitchass names their child Lenny-
Lenny: *abusing the fuck out of a machine* I HAVE NO IQ. THIS WILL DEFINITELY GET THIS SHIT RUNNING.
Guardian: 😳
Dutch: *approaches Lenny with Guardian* he Len
Lenny: hi
Dutch: we have a visitor who would like to speak to you about his favorite zombie apocalypse movie
Lenny: :0
Guardian: *zoned out*
Lenny: hmmm I'm gonna call him Snowball
Dutch: you and your fuckin nicknames-
Lenny: btw Richard and Finn are missing
Dutch: ... Fucc
Meanwhile
Anne, Miles and soldiers: *shooting newborns*
Soldiers: *dying*
Anne: ... Our soldiers are dumbasses
Miles: you just figured that out now-
Newborn: *attacks Anne*
Anne: fUC-
Miles: ANNE NOOOO!!
Newborn: ayo the pizza here
Miles: *tackles newborn* *rips off its head* I HOPE YOU BURN IN HELL MOTHERFUCKER!
Miles: Anne you good?
Anne: yeah lmao couldn't be better
Miles: ok, lets go to that station
Anne: ok
YOU ARE READING
Old shit
HumorYeh I'm planning on shoving my old stuff in here, so the old ship shit is getting put in here as well
