Diary of an Angry Husband | Jinkook ✔️

Thirty-Six

"Do you feel better now?" Jungkook asked as he wrapped his arms around Jin, pulling him down to sit next to him.

"I do. But what happens if, despite all the treatments, you are not cured? Doesn't it make more sense to do the surgery?" Jin had just received confirmation that his husband was only at stage two, and even though this wasn't great news, it made him feel better knowing they weren't going to have to deal with the worst.

"We will cross that bridge once we get there; however, I think the treatments will work, there have been one or two small improvements, and generally, it will take some months after treatment for me to find out about its effectiveness, and we have to believe that it will work. At the time I learned about surgery, it was not the best option for me. While radiation comes with many risks, it made sense as the better option back then, and it offers a good chance of curing me. Therefore, you need not worry about anything. I have just shown you all the stats, and if you want to call the doctor tomorrow, you can do so at the number I gave you. If you don't have too much on your plate tomorrow, you can come with me and ask all the questions you have, so you can feel more confident knowing that something else can kill me before this does."

"Why didn't you think it was the best option before?" Jin gripped Jungkook's hand, leaning his head against his shoulder. "Yes, I think it would be best if I came with you tomorrow. I need to understand this better. It's not that I don't believe you; I need to know more about this.

Knowing you, you like modifying things and making them sound simple, so I don't get hurt or worried, and I don't want you to do that. I must know the full details of all side effects and what should be expected after this series of treatments. Including the survival rate after treatment and how long it takes for someone to be cured after all of the treatment. I find these things important, and I want to get a better grasp of them.

I don't need a simple answer from you saying you are fine and how many treatments you have done thus far or a chart you could have created. I know you are a doctor, and you are aware of these things, but I want to explore further with your physician the pros and cons of you pushing through this."

Jungkook sighs, "I understand. I encourage you to come tomorrow to ask all your questions, as even if I answer them, you will doubt me. Furthermore, it's not like I'm modifying things for you, but honestly, I don't want you to worry right now, as you are undergoing a high-risk pregnancy. Stress and worrying about things that will be fine should be the least on your mind right now. In response to your question, I chose not to have surgery then because I did not want to give up on the chance of us having another child. This was before the news broke that you are expecting. My decision was based on my concerns about that.

While radiation does not eliminate that risk, there is still a possibility. However, now that you are pregnant, I do not have an interest in that risk. Besides that, I have thought about our future and our sexual life, and I was concerned that I would be the kind of husband who denied you something. Then giving you the chance to leave me-"

After sliding on Jungkook's lap, Jin straddled him, holding Jungkook's face and looking into his eyes; he said, "I understand your concern, but please let me tell you, no matter what happens, I will never leave your side. My relationship with you is not based on sex or because that was all I ever needed. You are my husband, and I cannot imagine my life without you. Jungkook, I am with you because I love you. Further, you have tolerated years of my mess, through and through. I will never leave you when you need me most. It would help if you did not worry about those things. Your primary focus should be on getting better. We are expecting another baby, and I will make sure I do my part not to cause another loss.

As I said, I recognize I have a problem. I know the process of fixing that problem won't be easy, but I plan to stay in therapy until I get it done. After reviewing former performance reports, the decision to promote some individuals who can help me more has already been made. I think this one employee could help out in Jimin's role, so I'm thinking about elevating them to an assistant role. They can build a partnership with him when he returns and help him out with some of the burdensome tasks I have pushed down onto him. I have a lot to think about in terms of restructuring, and I'll work on that later tonight to figure things out."