We sat in awkward silence in his living room. I had a scotch while he had tea.
I've never had to cuddle with all the women I've slept with. Well, except for Jasmine. But even then, it was never this awkward. And yet, Jake and I did not even sleep together. Still, I could not wrap my head around what had just happened.
My first kiss with a guy and all the sexual tension. His hands that burned on my skin, the firm grip he had around me. How I gave in and succumbed.
After a while, he sighed.
"Are you all right?" he asked, squinting as if I was blinding him with my silence. His face was a mixture of guilt and worry.
"I think I am. I'm just... I've never done anything like that or this before," I told him honestly.
"What do you mean you haven't done something like 'this'?"
"I don't do, uh, post-whatever conversations," I said, sipping my scotch. His eyes narrowed.
"What do you do then?"
"Sleep? Leave? I don't stay for morning coffee. Or scotch," I said, raising my glass. As abnormal or ill-mannered as it may sound, I hardly ever did.
"And your exes never complained?" He let out a surprised laugh, his grin showing the dimple on his left cheek. Then, I noticed a new cut hidden under his eyebrow.
"I don't have exes, remember?" I said, looking down at my interlaced fingers around the glass. From the corner of my eye, I saw his jaw drop as he leaned forward as if almost jumping out of his seat.
"No way. I know you said you've never fallen in love, but no exes?"
"Nope."
He laughed, not believing me. I just shrugged. "What an utter load of poppycock," he leaned back, still chuckling.
"I'm serious," I chuckled as the bizarreness of my statement got to me. I was thirty years old, and I've had no girlfriend since birth. Come to think of it, it did sound like total horseshit.
"Wow. Just wow." He shook his head, still grinning.
"Okay, so how bout you, Casanova?" I cocked an eyebrow, and he raised a finger as if to put me on hold.
"You're the definition of a Casanova, down to the T. Unlike you, I've had relationships, and I'm not afraid of commitments," he said.
"I never said I was afraid of commitments. I just never found someone worth committing to," I clarified and he just smirked. "Well, there was one, but she didn't feel the same way, so that didn't work out."
"So. Your relationships, were they with... guys?" I asked nervously.
"All but one was with women," his gaze began to wander. I understood he was uncomfortable with the topic of his exes, but I needed to know if he was familiar with what was going on between us because I sure as hell was not!
"And uh, this lone male ex," I gulped and fidgeted, not knowing how to word my question better. "How long ago did you realize you were, uh.."
"That I was attracted to the guy?" he finished my question and I felt my cheeks heat up. I was never this awkward during conversations. I was usually straightforward and tactful. Then again, it never involved my feelings or personal issues.
He laughed nervously and placed his cup on the table. "It happened about six, seven years ago when I moved to the United States. It took quite a while to come to terms with it, too. Maybe a year or so. But he was patient. We went out for about two years, including all the times we spent apart."
YOU ARE READING
Of Kings and Aces
RomanceWhat does it take to change the course of a person's life? One small, seemingly trivial decision. For Jacob, it was when he decided to play a game of poker in a new city he was supposed to call home for the next few years. But he was at the wrong...