Charlie
It was probably just after six in the evening when I woke up. Medyo may hint pa kase ng liwanag sa labas, nasisilip ko yun sa bintana ng kwarto ko.
I lied on my back, napansin kong wala na kong katabi sa kama. I'm pretty sure Ram was here when I fell asleep, tumabi sya sa'kin. I thought he would stay, coz he said he would, apparently, he didn't.
I willed myself to get up, I feel kind of stiff. Maybe due to my sleeping position. Naginat lang ako para matanggal yung paninigas ng kalamnan ko. I went out of my room afterwards.
Madilim din sa labas ng kwarto ko. Ram must have really left, naalala kong he was supposed to be out today.
Naupo ako sa stool sa kitchen counter. I can feel disappointment flood thru me. Pero ano pa bang ieexpect ko sa katulad ni Ram? Besides, hindi naman porket kinomfort n'ya ko, ibig nang sabihin importante ako sa kanya, para magstay s'ya.
Iilang araw pa lang kami na nagkakasama sa bahay, masyado nang napapalapit ang loob ko sa kanya. This is very wrong! I will certainly not permit myself to let anybody penetrate my barrier. Specially a guy like Ram, Not in this lifetime! He's the type of guy who would get into your life, have you built your dreams around him, then leave everything crashing down once he gets what he wants.
I already have one asshole, I don't need another one.
Masyado ata akong naging vulnerable kanina. I was in my weakest form, and he took advantage of that and paved his way through my barrier. But it wont happen anymore. Never!
I have to be very watchful from now on. If I really want to keep my virginity.
I sighed, I opened the refrigirator and got some beer. Ayokong isipin si Ram, at mas lalong ayoko rin isipin ang nangyare sa bahay namin kanina.
Bumalik ako sa kwarto ko, my eyes lingered to my phone. I snatched it off my nightstand and dialled Jareth's number.
Puro ring lang. Tapos 'the number you dialled is either unattended or out of coverage area, please try your call later' na. I went into almost twenty cycles of that, before I finally gave up. Baka busy lang si Jareth.
Sh*t! I feel so alone.
***
Bagamat madaling araw na kong nakatulog ay maaga parin akong nagising. Aagahan ko ang pasok ko ngayon, mabuti na yung may ginagawa ako, kesa nagmumukmok ako magisa dito sa apartment.
Hindi ko na namalayan kung umuwi ba kagabi si Ram. Pag gising ko naman, wala din s'ya. Maybe he's with some slut last night.
Nakakainis!!
Why the hell am I acting like this?! Kung meron ngang babaeng kasama si Ram ngayon, ano namang pakialam ko? Hindi ko s'ya boyfriend, I don't care about his sexpeditions! But why am I sulking?!
Nagmadali na lang akong magayos para makapasok na, para incase umuwi si Ram, I wouldn't have to deal with him.
The drive to work was a bit long and boring due to traffic. Pero hindi ko inalala yun dahil maaga naman akong pumasok. Kaya naman dumating ako on time sa clinic.
Hindi pa nagiinit ang pwet ko ay pumasok si Ms. de Leon. Isang HR staff ng University.
"Hi, good morning ma'am." tumayo ako mula sa desk ko bilang tanda ng paggalang.
"Goodmorning." siryosong siryoso s'ya, kala mo may pinagdadaanan. "Please sit down, Ms. Tuazon."
Tumalima naman ako, sya naman ay naupo sa tapat ng mesa ko. "What can I do for you Ms. de Leon?"
