BECOMING SUPRA

Chapter 20

ÆSH

I am in my mind. Engaging with light that is dynamic and alive, deflecting erratic vibrations flirting at the periphery. The light mutates, dots in bright colors, squares and triangles dancing, morphing into geometry.

CRASH!

Like the sudden vaulting of river fish, my soul lurches out of me. I open my eyes and catch the sight of a body hit the surface of the glass, then bounce off like dead wood. The force of the crash is so tremendous, it's echo reverberates inside the cubicle.

Rattled, I turn and look around in all directions but the body is nowhere to be seen. It has disappeared. Fear collects in my throat, like ants to a dead bug, I heave holding my chest. What was that? Who was that? I squiggle out of position and hurriedly exit the chamber.

I search the surroundings but find nothing out of the ordinary. I see Yinka and Ezra practicing in the distance and run towards them. "Did you see anyone? A man ... a boy, run past here?"

"No."

"He fell on my cubicle ... right there," I say pointing at the chambers.

"Fell? I didn't see anything fall, I've been facing that direction all along," said Yinka.

"The loud crash. You didn't hear it?"

"Not a thing," said Ezra.

I look at the sky then at my cubicle. I am certain I heard the crash, I am certain I felt my chamber shaking with the impact. I stand looking at them. Wondering. Is my mind playing tricks on me? I can't be making this up. I saw the body fall, I am sure of it. That person has to be around somewhere.

I break into a run and catch my reflection on the glass walls and I instinctively shrink away, I looked crazed ...I look terrified.

I find Hiranur and Chin-Hae practicing telekinesis by the moat.

"Did you guys see anybody come this way?" I could hear myself sounding more and more frantic.

"No," said Chin-Hae, briefly breaking concentration then went back to practicing.

"Maybe he crossed over the stream?"

"No, I didn't see anybody," said Hiranur. "Why do you look so ... distressed?"

Without answering I belt out in search of Raë. Where is Raë? Where is she? I find her at the edge of the forest, her arms carving the air as though conducting a symphony. Her focus alight, her fingers in flight, her hands moving as though holding the reins of puppeteer strings.

"Raë!"

She turns to face me.

"Did you see anybody come this way?"

"No ... I was in the middle of ...."

"He must have come through here ..." I say, desperately.

"Who?" Her face softens, studying my fear.

"I don't know."

"Why do you look so harrowed?"

"I saw this boy crash-fall onto the glass and now ... and now he's nowhere ... he just disappeared into thin air."

"What did he look like?"

"He looked like ...." I couldn't quite recall. I saw him fleetingly, only for a fraction. I looked up, in the open expanse I saw a black dot moving, a raptor was circling the sky right above me.

"He looked like ..."

"What did he look like?"

I turned to Raë when it suddenly hit me.

"He looked like me."

He-looked-like-me! The thought made my solar-plexus twist tightly inside of me. I abruptly turned and ran back to the center.

I entered the den, sat on the couch, clenching fists of hair and started rocking my torso back and forth.

I looked like him! My mind can't be making this up.

Then snippets of my dream-hallucination came to me like little larks flying in and out of my consciousness. I caught fragments of my nightmare, the one before the war of elements. My face! My face was ghoul-like, eye-sockets empty, sickly-green skin tightly stretched over my skull.

Feeling nauseous, I tried shaking the image out of my head. My heart was thrashing like a frightened rabbit, I broke out into a sweat. Memories of solitary confinement invaded me. Despair and gloom whirled around like blood-thirsty bats over dead meat.

Then Raë walked in and turned on the lights.

I looked up at her and mouthed, "I am losing my mind."