He had gotten up and left, with the tulips placed on Jin's stone, getting in his car and driving away. He didn't know where exactly he was heading, he just wanted to get his thoughts away from his head. He passed by his house a couple of times, not stopping at any of them as he didn't feel like going home just yet. His music was turned off, letting the air from outside come into his face as he rolled down the window.
It was close to late afternoon, seeing the sun slowly go down. He turned on his head lights as he saw other cars have theirs on, driving into the freeway as he took a sigh. He wanted to go somewhere, far from his memories, but he didn't know where to go. Not wanting to go to his parent's house nor Jin's parents house, he drove until his feet and hands couldn't drive no more.
'Be careful' he remembered the words of Jin, who always seemed to be scared whenever Taehyung would drive fast. He laughed a bit remembering how Jin screamed his lungs out just because Tae went a little over the speed limit.
"I'll be careful hyung.." he said, still keeping a smile on his mouth as he tried to think positive. Knowing Jin, he knew he hated whenever Taehyung thought negatively. It was as if all his negativity when into Jin's head, and Taehyung didn't want that.
Getting off of the freeway and into another town, Taehyung drove around, trying to see where he should stop. Coming upon a coffee shop, he remembered the first time he met Jin.
When he felt the first heart beat that made his heart race like crazy, where he couldn't keep his eyes off of him, it was as if he did something to him without trying. He parked his car outside of the shop, but didn't step out of his car. He stared at the shop, that had customers and workers, all doing their own things.
"I got nothing hyung.."
...
He thought. Believing he had nothing left, he didn't know what to do. That day, he didn't enter the shop, he didn't want to remember anything about him anymore, so he drove off. He simply thought of taking his thoughts away and not going back until dark. He did as he planned, getting home late that day and going off to sleep.
Days passed, soon turning into months, passing quickly for Taehyung. He began to slowly heal, crying a few times before letting go at his comfort. He knew he was gone now, he knew it was for the best to let him go, to let him rest, to let him be at ease.
Taehyung realized he was never alone, all those moments, he had someone by his side. His parents, Jin's parents, Seok-joong and including Ken, they held onto each other, through their struggles and hard emotions, they held tightly onto one another. They accepted the grief, they accepted the lost, and most of all, accepted to move on.
But Taehyung couldn't let go of one part. His love for Jin, never left his heart, he couldn't love another the same way he loved Jin. He didn't feel the same thump as he did whenever he was with Jin, he didn't feel the same emotions for another whenever he saw Jin, nothing was the same love for another as if were for Jin. Taehyung knew he couldn't love another, even if he tried.
It had now been a year since his pass, to Taehyung's surprise, he was doing better than he had expected. He visit Jin's stone every once in a while, always remembering to take his favorite white tulips. He would always say something along the lines 'I love you' or 'take care' before placing the flowers on the same spot as he did the first days.
"Son!" Taehyung's mother shined a smile as she held onto the white tulips. They were ready to head to Jin's stone, Taehyung all dressed up as he wanted to look good for his death anniversary. He sighed as he fixed his tie, seeming to not be able to put it in its right place.
"Aish this kid.." his mother walked up to him, placing the flowers on the bed as she fixed his tie. Knowing him, she knew he didn't tried to learn how to tie a tie, fixing for him as she also wanted him to look good.
"Ready?" Taehyung nodded, taking the tulips and grabbing onto his mother's arm. Walking out the door, they both found Tae's father ready to leave as they headed out the house. They got in the car, Taehyung fixing his hair as it got a bit messy from the small wind.
The car ride was silent, but Taehyung liked it. He rarely talked whenever they headed to Jin's stone, seeming to try to calm himself and try his best to not cry. He managed to stop his crying most of the time, yet other times a few tears would manage to fall out.
Arriving upon the cemetery, Taehyung took a deep breath before stepping out the car. He saw Jin's parents with his brother coming out of another car, smiling at them as he headed to Jin's mother. He had gotten closer to her as he was comfortable around her.
"Ready?" Taehyung asked, hugging her as he took a deep sigh. It was always Jin's hug that gave him strength, and now it was his mothers that gave him strength. Jin's mother wrapped her arm around Taehyung's, the both of them walking until they got to Jin's stone. They all stood in front of the stone in silence, like they usually would until one of them would break the silence.
"Seokjin.." it was Jin's mother who broke it this time. She kneeled down, staring at the yet gray stone, smiling at it as she placed her own flowers in the same spot.
"You still look handsome like day one" she had placed a small frame that contained Jin's photo a few months ago, surprised to still see it placed next to his stone. She couldn't speak no more. She lost all her thoughts in process as she still kneeled get in silence.
"Mother..you okay?.." Seok-joong asked, staring at her as he saw her closing her eyes. He hummed in response, letting her be.
After a few, she stood up, looking at Taehyung who smiled at her in worry. She smiled back at him in peace, walking away as she always did. Taehyung looked away from her and onto Jin's stone, kneeling himself. Seok-joong and Jin's father had walked away with Jin's mother, leaving Taehyung with his parents.
"My love..how quickly time has passed..it's been a year now since..you left this world.." Taehyung smiled, feeling tears trying to come out of his eyes but holding it in. Feeling a lump come into his throat, he tried to swallow it, making him cough in the process.
"Ah..I know you must be tired of me bringing tulips every time I come, but how can I not bring them to such a beauty?..right..I got a new job..I wanted to tell you that..I couldn't take the other one, it wasn't for me..Yeontan grew more too!!..haha!!.." he joked around, knowing Yeontan in fact, did not grow at all.
"You know..I miss you everyday..but I know I should move on..I just..sometimes can't, you know?..jin..hyung..you were like no other..I can't bring myself to love another..I..I can't..why?..because my heart won't let me hyung.." he played with his fingers, noticing he was now alone. His parents must have walked away when he spoke to him. He didn't mind, he wanted to be alone.
"I still have the ring..I don't plan to marry another that isn't you Jin..even if someone begs me..I won't. I'll get better, don't worry about me..rest now hyung..you should rest.." Taehyung smiled, before kissing the tulips and placing them back on the stone.
Getting up, he stared at Jin's photo for a few seconds, before turning around and walking back to his car. As he stepped inside, his tears slowly fell, but his smile still bloomed. Knowing now that he was gone, his heart beat normally, wishing the best for Jin, hoping that he'll meet him once again in another life.
The end
"Stop trying to keep me alive, I've already died, we're two worlds apart my love.." -SJ
"You're the one I can't lose, no one loves me like you do.." -TH
