Forever & Always 3

0.9

"What makes you think it's okay to show up at my workplace, every fucking time you feel jealous?" Hadiyeh was raging. 

"I wasn't jealous." He looks at the floor, too ashamed to make eye contact with Hadiyeh. He regretted it as soon as he stepped into Paris but he couldn't go back. He was insecure and uneasy, the only person who knew how to calm him down was the same person who had made him feel this way.

"Look at me," Hadiyeh said softly as she kneeled in front of him her abaya spread across the floor. She felt her heart fracture, seeing JJ this vulnerable was rare and it wasn't because he was in subspace, it was because he was anxious, after his mainstream media career had begun so did his problems with his mental health, if it wasn't for Hadiyeh god knows where he'd be by now. 

The mellow moonlight coming through the hotel window lit up her complexion like she was an angel. And she truly was a heavenly being, to him she was no different from a saint.

"Hads, I acted irrationally and I was stupid, you deserve Nas or whatever his name is." He directed his gaze away from Hadiyeh again and stared at his hands as they played with the ring on his finger.

"No. No, I don't." She chuckled taking his hand into hers her small fingers wrapping around his massive palm and kissed his knuckle a smile forming on her lips as she spoke "wouldn't it be such a downgrade, from dating the big YouTuber KSI to my assistant?"

"Oh, so it's all for my fame?" His tone wasn't hard anymore. Lighter but still unhappy.

"No, it's because of your money." She deadpanned as he laughed loudly, knowing of all the reasons shed date or marry him his money would be the last reason on her list.

"Did you just admit that I'm richer than you?" He tilted his head back with a playful smirk on his lips.

"Alright, don't get too cocky, I might just take it back." She smiled, knowing it was a lie, she was richer than the boys put together but that was a discussion for another day.

"I'd rather you not." He laughs this time his face lights up, illuminating the room with his glow.

"Well, then Knowledge I want a reason as to why you decided to surprise me with your presence in Paris?"

"I felt like it."

"There's more to that." She pushed him knowing damn well that there is more to what he's saying, she could see the discomfort in his eyes but she couldn't be of any help if he wasn't willing to communicate with her.

"What do you want me to say? To tell you that I'm fucking insecure? To tell you that I've seen so many people cheat because they know that their significant other isn't enough? Hads, you're like an angel on this planet, you deserve so much better than me."

"You don't get it, do you? I fell in love with you with all of you. I didn't get to pick and choose what I love about you, this isn't building a boyfriend. We made an oath to love everything about each other. I love the way you fall into subspace. I love the way you won't have dinner unless you've had a g-fuel drink before it. I love the way you'd never wear skinny jeans because you think they'd make you look gay even though you look hot. I fall more in love with you every day." She sighs as he looks at her in awe, "I fell in love all over again when I saw you with Jannah for the first time whilst I was in the hospital, I loved you more when I found out that the only reason you were so sad that you couldn't have kids was that you thought you were holding me back from motherhood."

"JJ I fell in love with you. All of you."

JJ leaned down and closed the gap between them. Their lips collided as did their worlds. Two very different worlds. Both lived busy and chaotic lives, but when it came to each other, they always found time. They fit like puzzle pieces.

"I love you." He didn't know what else to say, as they both pulled away out of breath, hungry for more. No amount of words would get his message across, so he settled for the next best three words.

"I love you so much more," 

That night they made love. Slow, passionate, exhilarating love. Because words would not be enough, their love was better than words and more than a feeling. 

After their climax, JJ rested himself against Hadiyeh, his braids falling around her neck and shoulder. She didn't mind though, she enjoyed his presence around her. 

"I'm sorry for how I reacted, ever since my dad cheated on my mum, it's never been the same." 

"I get it," She sighed, her fingertips running across his muscular back as he curled into her touch enjoying the comfort that radiated off her. She did feel a bit offended that he'd suggest for her to be anything like his family but she understood his self-doubts. An unhealed scar from childhood had turned into an open wound that still left him vulnerable.

"Thank you," He breathed out his hot breath fanning over her collarbone, as he looked up at her through his eyelashes. He was thankful to her for understanding, but he was more thankful to the universe for setting them up together. She was a blessing on his path. Just as he was a blessing on hers.

"I love you so much, never forget that." She kissed his head just as they both fell asleep, unaware of what was coming towards them.

Written: 10/10/2021

Published: 12/10/2021

(A/N: go shower the men in your lives with love, they deserve it no matter how coldhearted some may seem, most homies are just insecure <33 and I've realized I'm failing computing class cuz I've been writing instead of coding XD)