Another Lifetime

Chapter 40:

Cesar's POV:
"I was gonna go see you but you were busy being a Santo." Monse says and Mona cries. "So you just decided I was too busy to meet my daughter?!" I yell. "Monse, I could've met her months ago." I try to calm down but I can't. "I didn't wanna start anything when I knew I was going back home." She defends herself. Monse tries taking Mona form me but I don't let her. "I got it!" I yell and she cries even louder. "How old was she?" I ask Monse. "I don't know. Maybe two months. I brought her here a week after she left the NICU ." She shrugs. "Two fucking months?" I scream. "I was scared." She reaches for Mona again. "Give me my damn baby. I don't care how pissed you are, I'm not letting scream until you figure out what to do." She says and I give her my daughter. "Maybe I'd know what to do if you let me meet her four months ago." I remind her. Monse holds Mona and rubs her back until she's done crying. "I didn't wanna get us killed." Monse says. Mona hugs her mom like she never wants to let go. "She's my daughter too. I wanna know her." I tell Monse. "That's why I'm back. I could've stayed away but I didn't." She says. "Why'd you stay away in the first place?" I ask.
**** four months ago ****
My dad watches Mona while I look for Cesar. When I find him, I wish I didn't. He's jumping someone out and they aren't moving. When they're done some bitch walks over and kisses him. Whoever Cesar is now, I don't want shit it do with him.
**** present ****
"I don't remember." She's lying. "What'd you see?!" I can't tell if I'm pissed or scared. "Y'all are gonna traumatize this poor kid. Come here Mona." Spooky walks in and takes my daughter. Valeria's holding his hand and trying to walk next to him. "I saw you kill someone. You were jumping him out. That's two, right? Latrelle and that guy." Monse whispers when Spooky leaves with the girls. "Sure, two." I sit on her bed. "You scared of me now?" I ask. "I wasn't when you killed Latrelle. When I saw you literally beat the life outta someone, yeah I was scared. I've seen guys like that beat their girls... their kids. How was I supposed to know you weren't one of them?" She asks. "You could've talked to me! I would never hurt either of you. You really think I'd ever do anything to hurt you?" I ask her. "You wouldn't but whoever I saw that day, maybe. I know that you gotta be able to shut it off to get through shit like that. You didn't look shut off." She says. "I wasn't." I say honestly. "So you get why I didn't want you to see her!" She crosses her arm. "I didn't say that." I tell Monse. "Fine, then what are you saying?" She asks. "That it doesn't matter what you saw. None of that changes the fact that Mona's mine." I remind her. "She's my daughter too." I say. "I was protecting her. Even if I didn't have her I still wouldn't have talked to you after that." She's pissed. "Why not?" I ask. "Because I was scared." Monse says it like it's obvious. "Of me?" I ask. "Yeah... and me." She admits. "What do you mean?" I've never been so confused and pissed at the same time. "I saw a girl kiss you and I think that was the closest I've ever been to really being my father's daughter." She laughs but I can see she's nervous. We all know what Monty went after every guy Selena even looked at. Until Dwayne. He killed one of them. "Mm I get it." I smirk and she rolls her eyes. "You piss me off. I don't need that." Monse shrugs. "Or you were jealous." I pull her on my lap. "And that pissed you off." I put my hands on her ass. "I was protecting Mona from having two murderer parents." She says and I smile. "Right." I kiss her and she pulls back. "We're fighting, stop trying to be cute." She tells me. "I get why you kept her away. What I don't get is why you didn't just give in and fight the girl?" I ask her. "What?" She laughs. "I'm not Latrelle, I like when you handle shit." I remind her. "I was tired. Having a newborn isn't easy." She tries to get off my lap but I pull her back down. "You miss being in the life?" I ask Monse. "Sometimes." She shrugs. "You miss me?" I smirk and she rolls her eyes. "Yeah." She looks at my lips and I kiss her. "You ever pull shit like that again and you're gonna have to keep on missing me. Our daughter comes first and I don't want you keeping her away. If you're scared, talk to me. If you wanna fight someone, call me." I kiss her neck. "Why would I call you?" She asks. "So I can watch." I laugh. "What if I'm jealous?" Monse puts her hands on my shoulders. "I'll fix it. No matter what I'm doing. You just have to say the word and I'll show up." I say and Monse kisses me. "And what if I just wanna do this?" She asks. "I'll get to you even faster." I pull off her shirt. "Yeah?" She raises her eyebrows. "Every time." I swear. "Ok, so tell your girlfriend that." She runs her thumb over my cheek before she gets up. "I kinda need my shirt back." Monse says. "That's it?" I ask. "I'm not sleeping with you when you have a girlfriend... or when there's three kids, your brother, and my dad in the other room." She leans over, kisses me, and when I try putting my arms around her waist she takes back her shirt. "Thank you." She gets dressed and she goes. How the hell does she always make me forgive her?