one minute || h.s

fifteen

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Hallie.

Tequila wasn’t a fan of mine but, surprisingly, I didn’t wake up with a hangover, then again, I didn’t drink nearly as much as Harry had. He’d wake up with a killer one. Somehow, we’d fallen asleep on opposite sides of the tufted couch pit and I laughed because he was falling halfway off of it and he was drooling and snoring all at the same time. Idiot. Our random PG-rated hookup came back to me and I sat there wondering whether it was just the Tequila or whether it was the Tequila mixed with our loneliness and/or sadness…or whether there was something there. I couldn’t deny that there had been something, but I had absolutely no clue what that something was. My insides felt weird…strange even. My heart had been beating so quickly, I didn’t know how to feel. I kissed my best friend. My best friend kissed me…we kissed. I rolled off the couch and walked into the kitchen, looking for my phone. 

HM: help. 

MA: help with what?

HM: something happened.

MA: please tell me you didn’t run somebody over…

HM: um no…! we kissed…

MA: who kissed?

HM: me and harry!

MA: okay…? finally babe.

HM: mar!!! harry and i kissed i have no idea what to do about it or how to feel! he’s my best friend!

MA: um…no. i’m your best friend. he’s the boy you’re supposed to be with

HM: how come you aren't making a big deal out of this???

MA: because you two should’ve gotten together too long ago. you aren’t just best friends. 

HM: what is happening

MA: what should have happened months and months ago. you don’t see the way he looks at you, do you?

HM: how does he look at me?

MA: like you’re his whole world. i just can’t believe you’ve been so oblivious.

HM: you really think that’s how he sees me?

MA: are you blind?

HM: i’m confused is what i am

MA: i have to go, but can you do me a favor?

HM: sure

MA: have an open mind? think about this because i think he’d make you really happy, okay?

HM: okay. 

MA: good girl. love you! i’ll call you later xo

HM: love you too.

The morning after a big rainstorm was my favorite kind of morning. There was dew on the grass and the trees, the ground was steamy and the cloud covering was still blocking out the sun, but there was just something nice about it all. In a split second, I made a decision that wasn’t a terrible one. I stripped out of my clothes, leaving me in my lavender Aerie boy’s shorts and bralette, and I hurried down the backyard steps. Without thinking about it any further, I dove into the pool. The water was cool and it felt nice compared to the muggy air. Did I have feelings for Harry? I tried to think about him with someone else and it made my insides churn. I thought about him cuddling on the couch pit with Nadine and then quickly shook the thought away. I didn’t want him with anyone else, and something told me he didn’t want me with anyone else. My mind drifted back to our conversation in the hotel room in Cardiff. I’ve only ever been in love with one person. One. And you know what? I knew the very moment. I remember every second of it. Every minuscule detail of that moment. Was I that one person? You don’t think. You know. I knew. You’ll know. Suddenly, the world seemed to stop spinning and every moment of our friendship came flooding back and I remembered his eyes watching me or the beautiful smile on his face when I’d laugh at his shit jokes…every stupid little thing made sense.

“Hey…” I hadn’t seen him approaching, but now he was standing on the edge of the pool and I was looking up at him and his hair was an awful mess and I’m pretty sure he had dried drool stuck to his face. I didn’t say anything. I couldn’t. After a few seconds, he stripped off his t-shirt and his basketball shorts and he waded in. “I feel like shit.”

“You practically drank the entire bottle.”

“Did not.”

“Did too.”

“You helped.” I laughed at him and ducked underneath the water. When I came back up, his eyes were serious and the mood wasn’t really very lighthearted anymore.

“Harry—”

“No…no, I’m sorry, okay? I’m sorry for putting you in that position last night. I’m sorry for pulling that and kiss—” I cut him off, well, my lips did. I kissed him hard and he tasted like stale alcohol and sleep but I kissed him because I felt it too. Slowly, he responded, his hands gripped my waist as my arms wrapped around his neck. I kissed him because he was my best friend who I definitely had feelings for.

“Are you still sorry?” His smile grew immensely and he nuzzled his nose against mine. 

“Don’t think so, no…”

“Good.” Kiss. “Do you regret kissing me last night?”

“Absolutely not.” Kiss.

“Would you take any of it back if you could?”

“Never in a million years.” Kiss.

“I’d have to punch you in that stupid face of yours…” He chuckled and spun me around in the water and I refused to let go of him. 

“Hey, Hallie.” I smiled a really big smile because my entire being was cleared up now. I knew what I wanted and it—he was looking at me like Brayden looked at Marianne and I knew that this was right. 

“Hey, Harry.” Another spine tingling kiss happened and I decided that I probably wasn’t ever going to let go of him, nor would I ever get used to the feeling of his lips on mine. It was something…something insane. Something beautiful was happening here and I knew that I wanted to dive in head first, because there didn’t seem to be a better way, especially when the person I cared about most in this world was standing by my side, ready to embrace it entirely.