thirty-nine

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Harry.


I think, that being a part of the world's largest band, being a fifth-a fourth-of One Direction, there are so, so many great things, amazing things that come out of it. Having the ability to give back and having the ability to take care of the people that we love...it's quite nice. Definitely don't like complaining, really. But along with the good, bad things come as well. Being Louis Tomlinson or Niall Horan or Liam Payne...being the tied down, more grounded ones, it makes it so that Harry Styles became known for the abundance of relationships, the different girls every week, the parties and clubbing, and it was a shame-it is a shame, because I've never been that person. I've dated girls, sure. I've slept with girls, obviously, but I've never been in love with any of them. Never anyone until Hallie and I feel like the moment I'm happy, the world makes ruining any chance of that it's mission. It's a funny thing, my mum told me once, years ago...when you find the person you're supposed to be with, you'll know. Hallie was my person. My girl, my life, my bloody everything. The world saw that. They caught onto my happiness, my bliss...they grabbed onto it and me being absolutely miserable was their new goal. I think being miserable, it was something I could live with, or learn to live with. The mere thought of Hallie being so...crushed me. I couldn't even bear the thought. New York had been good. We'd done tons of positive promoting for the album, it was close to Christmas time...I'd be going back home to England for a bit, but first, I got to see Hallie. She'd be taking the pets and going to Napa to be with her dad and his family. Ever since the divorce was finalized, she'd been less in contact with her mum and more in contact with him. They were like two peas in a pod, she and her dad. Closer than most fathers and daughters. I was happy for her, although I wished Christmas could be spent with her, especially seeing as how it'd be the first holiday spent without her mum. I wanted to be there for her. But neither of us could make time, and that was fine. It was something we'd accepted. Didn't necessarily make it easy, but it was doable. "Matey-mate!" Niall came sauntering into my hotel suite, his silly golf hat perched lopsided on his bleached head.

"What can I do for you, Niall?"

"You're not dressed, twat. Get dressed."

"M'not going, Niall."

"That's a load'a shit, Styles. Get your arse off the bed, stop dreamin' about Hallie and get outta 'dose clothes. Y'look a bloody wreck."

"It's going to be a media field day, Niall. Can't go."

"C'mon, Harry! Tommo and Payno are goin'!"

"Yes, right, but Louis never dated any of the women there and Liam has Soph with him. If Hallie was here, it'd be a different story, but she's not. I'm not going."

"You're bein' a right piece of shit, did y'know that? An absolute prick." I laughed him away.

"Don't wanna go, Niall." I watched as he pulled his phone out from his back pocket. "Who're you calling?" He didn't answer me.

"Oi! Hallie...Harry's bein' a pain in me arse!...Why? Cause he's not goin' to a Christmas party with us tonight...yes, a mopey tit, is what he's bein'...yes! That's what I said! 'Ere talk to 'im." The phone was thrusted into my face and I groaned.

"Hi baby..."

"Go to the party."

"No."

"Harry, I'm running late for a meeting right now so I can't talk, but I'm going to an IFC Christmas party tonight! Just go and don't be a mopey baby, baby. Go and have fun, don't be that guy."

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