romeo + juliet ↠ l.h

35

Becoming strangers with someone you once gave everything to is an odd thing.

We don't mean for it to happen, it just does. We may not even notice that it happens right away, but it's slow. A slow gradual feeling of unfamiliarity that creeps into your mind and makes a home.

Is it possible to push it away? Is it possible to make up for lost time?

I wished I held the answers to these questions. It would make the next conversation a lot easier. If we could return to the old us, as if the last seven months hadn't happened.

But that's not possible when both of us had changed. He didn't look like himself, and while I looked the same I can assure you I was not the girl I was on the day he left.

Maybe if he had spoke, my thoughts would turn elsewhere. Maybe if he had pulled me aside and kissed me, I would be saying something completely different.

Instead, he cast his icy glare in my direction, as if I was the one in the wrong.

Or maybe that's just his face now. Cold eyes and down turned lips.

I didn't recognize the face in front of me. The one who told me he loved me. The one who rescued me. The one who told me to wait for him. The one I was ready to give up everything for.

Instead, I just brought the blunt to my lips and inhaled, as if the high would make Luke vanish. I could pretend he wasn't here and that this wasn't happening.

I wouldn't cry. I wouldn't let him see that. I'm not the same as I was, and I sure as hell wasn't weak.

"You okay, Emma?" Kai whispered as he leaned in, scooting his chair closer to mine. "You look like you've seen a ghost."

Little did he know, I did see a ghost.

"I just need a second." I whispered back, rising from my chair as Luke continued to silently stare me down.

No 'hi, how have you been?'. No apology. No acknowledgement.

I made my way back into the kitchen, the music becoming louder as I pushed through the growing crowd of people and searched for Ruby. A hand grabbed my wrist, and my heart plummeted. Is this it? Is this our reconnection? Or is this the end?

But instead, it was just Kai.

"Are you okay?" he called from behind me.

"I just need a second." I spoke, feeling my high slowly come on. The tingly feeling in my legs took over first before my head became slightly heavy. My growing high provided little comfort, but I don't know what I expected.

What I expected to be a fun night with my friends turned into something I wasn't ready to confront. If I ignored it, would it go away? I could pretend Luke wasn't out there in that garage, sitting cool in an old recliner looking brand new and aged.

"Let's go sit down." Kai grasped my hand to weave me through the crowd of people and towards the one couch that sat vacant.

A sudden movement from Kai nearly knocked me off balance, but when I looked back I saw the one person that I wanted to pretend didn't exist.

"What the fuck, man?" Kai yelled after regaining his balance.

Luke stood next to him, his eyes fogged and glossed over and fists clenched.

"Touch her again and I swear to God, I'll beat the shit out of you." Luke's words slurred and his lips were dry and cracked.

Kai, my slow-tempered best friend, just looked shocked and confused. But I knew him, he would stay calm.