Because He's My Crush

28 - I'm Proud of You

"Miles can I borrow your laptop for a sec? I need to send a mail to my professor and my laptop is at the repair shop." I asked from the male in the kitchen cutting up some fruits.

"Yeah sure, it's in my room on the desk." He said and shared his password for me to log in.

I walked to his room and started the device. He had been working on something it seemed by the multiple tabs he had open on the browser in addition to his mail inbox that popped up first. I was going to open a new tab for my work until a few words of the opened mail caught my eye unintentionally that I couldn't help but read the subject of it just when Miles burst into the room out of the blue.

"Wait Summer I- Oh dang it, you saw."

His reaction told me that he had meant to hide the mail and the whole matter of it from me. Though I didn't want to be rude I couldn't get my eyes away from the sender of the mail before I finally turned to look at my boyfriend.

"You got a permanent job offer?"

He nodded silently.

"Why didn't you tell me? You seemed like you wanted to hide it?" My voice was softer than usual and he seemed to notice it. He looked up at me.

"You saw the company and the sender right?"

"Did you accept the offer?" I ignored his question and asked again.

"Summer it was sent by your mom. It's from her company. I know because before I take up a project or something like this I always look up the company to see if I want to accept or not. That's how I saw her on their site." He ran his fingers through his hair as he took a seat on the mattress of the bed. He heaved a sigh before speaking again. "I can't go to work and see your mom for eight hours a day. She may or may not remember me but it's just awkward and weird for me. Who knows what she might do if she gets to know we're living together now? What if she comes after you again? It's just better to refuse it so I did."

I didn't know if I should feel happy or sad hearing his words. He was given such a rare and a great opportunity to start working as soon as he finished college but because of me he had rejected the offer. I felt like such a burden on him. I was always on the receiving end and now he had started to lose great things like this too. I remembered how he mentioned that after one more project he'd be able to buy a car for himself but now he'd have to wait until another client reaches out for him. I couldn't help but feel so disgusted and angry about myself.

"I didn't reject their offer beacuse of you. It was for myself. I'm happy the way I earn now and I have plenty of time to look for a permanent job after college. That too if I need one." As if he had read my mind, or maybe he noticed the stray tear I sneakily wiped away, Miles stated calmly.

"My parents, they went abroad after my graduation." I revealed for the first time.

I hadn't felt comfortable sharing it until now because it always made me cry to think what could have happened differently if I didn't have the parents that I had. I missed their love I never got and it would make me spiral into a frenzy of self-pity that I hated with my whole being. I had wanted to run away from it for as long as possible.

"Mom wanted me to study medicine and be a doctor. I would earn a lot of respect and money, she said. But I didn't want to become a doctor. Never had I envisioned myself wearing a white coat and running around the hospital hallways. I wanted to do something I loved and I finally mustered up the courage to tell her. I defied her for the first time in my life and the next thing I know is that they had sold the house and had bought tickets to move out of the country on my graduation day. No goodbyes or last words. My parents disappeared completely from my life just like that. The only family there to cheer me on was Nova's. They happily took me in until I found a place to stay, the one I was kicked out of before I came here."

I hung my head low even after finishing what I had to say, more tears welling up at the recall of the events. I heard his footsteps getting closer to me before he pulled me into a tight embrace I much needed. Miles didn't say anything but kept on stroking my head gently as if to comfort me and let me cry into his chest. I let go completely and cried all the frustrations I had in me, things I couldn't share out loud. I just wanted to cry.

"I'm so proud of you Summer. Thank you for holding on all this time. I'm sorry I wasn't there for you when you were going through so much but I promise you that you won't be alone again. Not now, not ever. I'm right here."

His words were like a sweet ambrosia that made me forget all the bad things for a moment and I wrapped my hands around his waist tightly, feeling so much loved and cared for like I had never been before.

He had become my comfort.

He had become my safe place.

It was a realization that made a warmth creep up to my heart. I had started to like him long ago but everyday I felt myself going deeper and deeper. At first I wondered if I was just being dramatic about everything that was between us but now it was as clear as daylight to me.

I had fallen for him.

I had fallen in love with him.

I love him.

[A/N]
Merry Christmas everyone! Have a wonderful one this year🎄❤💫