we're just best friends | wroetoshaw

eighteen

tw: mention of self harm
"cel what have you been doing in there?" frey looked at me with a concerned look.
"n-nothing why" i looked over at jj who had his head down and couldn't look me in the eye.
"jj did you tell them?" his eyes met mine and he nodded.
"you promised"
"you promised you'd never do it again"
"i said i wouldn't be able to keep that, you promised, i was going to get help jj, why?"
"i couldn't keep it in, you needed people around you to help you"
"jj i didn't, when all of you were together and i was alone i was fine. it's a way to cope and none of you understand" i went to run back in my room when the same familiar hand grabbed mine. it was harry's.
"cel just stop running away"
"let go of me" i tried to wriggle out of his grip but he was a lot stronger than me. i looked up to his eyes and there were tears. and that's when i fell. straight to the ground and cried. i brought my knees up to my face and let it all out. the warmth off everyone around me gave me a piece of mind and it was nice. people cared for me. i stood up and looked around at all the crying faces. i never meant to cause them pain only myself.
"don't cry please, the pain was for me not you" i looked over and saw milly with just her arms crossed.
"milly are you okay?" i asked worryingly.
"no i'm not okay, your in love with my fucking boyfriend"
how did she know?
everyone looked at me.
"i-i don't"
"i heard you shouting this morning, just have him he's into you more than me"
"milly listen, he's not. he tells me everyday how much he's in love with you. i'm not in love with him it's just the thought of having someone around. please don't give up on your relationship, you guys are soulmates" the last word hurt, they weren't. it was me and him. i looked up at harry and he was staring at milly. he'd chosen her. he ran over and kissed her, his choice was obvious.
"milly, your always going to be my first choice."
oh
i smiled at them and walked away back into my room. nothing could happen anymore, no blade. everyone knew, they'd always be around watching my every move. i was like an animal in a zoo and they were the tourists. i went to go change my clothes when i heard a knock on the door.
"come in" i beckoned.
"cel, i'm so sorry. i couldn't face living with it. i can't keep secrets and you needed help."
"jj it's okay, i needed the help and you telling them has already helped me loads, like a weight of my shoulders. thank you for telling them." i leant over towards him and pulled him in for a hug.
"how are you feeling about harry and milly?"
"shit, but he's happy. and i guess that's all he needs."
"they aren't soulmates trust me, you can see in his eyes that they don't glisten like they do when he's with you. your his soulmate and he knows. he just needs to find that out."
jj believed it too. we were soulmates, but love happens at the wrong time. just try and try again and love always succeed. it takes time but everything happens for a reason.
"i think i'm gonna go to a therapist" jj looked at me and smiled.
"i think that would be good" he pulled me in again for a hug. when jj left i found a therapist who i thought would be perfect for me. her name was dr. riya rafiq. i had booked an appointment for tomorrow. i walked out of my room and went and told the others about the therapist.
"we're so proud of you" talia said to me. i had a huge group hug and i felt safe. i looked around to see where harry was but he wasn't there and neither was milly.
oh they'd gone.
"where's harry?" i asked.
"he's um gone home with milly" lux replied.
"right okay" i gave a small smile.
"we know you love him, but your brave. i don't know how you do it, watching him be in love with someone else and accepting it." freezy said.
"i'm used to it, nobody's ever really loved me my only relationship was abusive and the rest have just been one night stands." i looked down at the floor.
"you just need to heal, your the bravest person i know and you've been through so much shit which you didn't deserve. everyone here loves you so so much." gee said which made me smile. i decided i was going to post on instagram when i came across a post i didn't want to see.

liked by faithlouisak, behzinga and others
wroetoshaw: happiest with you🫂
👤: @millyhollowxo
view comments
@ksi: at least have a bit more respect mate
^^ @faithlouisak: i back that
^^ @behzinga: me three
^^ @wroetoshaw: fucking hell mate          sorry for having a relationship

@milliehollowxo: my soulmate❤️‍🩹
^^ @wroetoshaw: my forever🫂