It's only him {Kagehina Book}

Chapter 2

𝗛𝗶𝗻𝗮𝘁𝗮'𝘀 𝗣𝗼𝘃

Fuck... Here we go again. I slowly made my way to a living room. There were many bottles of alcohol. I sighed.

"What do you want" I asked.

"Don't give me that attidute, you bitch." My father stood up and looked at me.
"Where were you?"

I looked at the ground, thinking if I should tell the true.
"I-I was in the volleyball practice... And a school..."
My father clenched fist.
"I'm not asking for that. Where you was that fucking 15 minutes you slut??!?"

I holded my tears. I can't show that I'm weak, not infront of him.
"I-I was... was waiting for a friend. I-I'm so so-sorry... I won't do that again." I bowed my head down.

"Friend? You have friends? Wow I'm speechless" I looked him in the eyes, hoping he wouldn't be angry anymore. But boy hell no. His eyes raged with anger.

"I guess I need to make you learn your mistake, you faggot."
I swallowed, but saliva got stuck. Please no.

"Pleasee!! Wai-" I stopped talking because he punched my face. My father pushed me on the ground. And kicked, punched me. I couldn't hold my tears anymore, they were going like a river from my eyes. I choked on my own blood. My vision got blurry. Thats when he stopped and last thing he did, was that he spitted on my face.
"𝑊𝑜𝑤... 𝐼 𝑛𝑒𝑒𝑑 𝑡𝑜 𝑔𝑒𝑡 𝑢𝑝, 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑤𝑎𝑠ℎ 𝑚𝑦𝑠𝑒𝑙𝑓." I was amazed that my minds still worked very well. I somehow managed to get myself on the feets. I got to the bathroom. Good thing, my father was already asleep, drunk af. I sat on cold bathroom floor. Tears still streaming down. I couldn't think straight anymore.
Voices in my head took over it.
"𝑊𝑜𝑤 𝑙𝑜𝑜𝑘 ℎ𝑜𝑤 𝑤𝑒𝑎𝑘, 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑝𝑎𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑡𝑖𝑐 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑎𝑟𝑒."
I know.
"𝑊ℎ𝑦 𝑑𝑜𝑛'𝑡 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑚𝑎𝑘𝑒 𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑚 𝑓𝑒𝑒𝑙 𝑔𝑢𝑖𝑙𝑡𝑦 ℎ𝑢ℎ?"
Yes. Exactly. I need one thing. I opened the bathroom cabinet and took some razor blades. Ah... Sharp as always. I smiled through my tears. I touched it. It felt good.
"𝐷𝑜 𝑖𝑡. 𝑆ℎ𝑜𝑤 𝑡ℎ𝑎𝑡 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑎𝑟𝑒 𝑛𝑜𝑡 𝑤𝑒𝑎𝑘 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑝𝑎𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑡𝑖𝑐. 𝐵𝑢𝑡 𝐼 𝑔𝑢𝑒𝑠𝑠 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑎𝑟𝑒?"
No!!. They are right. I slowly took my wrist and placed blade against it. It-It's cold. All problems suddently disappeared. I felt happy. I slowly cutted one scratch. Just one. Then another one, one more. Till it was all over my arm.
Then I passed out on the floor.

I opened my eyes to look at my watch. It was 5:15 am. Fuck... I only have 45 minutes to get to school. I somehow stood up and washed my face. Then looked over my arm. It was all dirty and full of cuts. I washed it too. Then putted some bandages over it. Don't worry I washed and hide my razor blades too. I made my way to my room, got changed and took my bag. Then slowly so I wouldn't make any sounds went to first floor and opened doors. Thank God he didn't hear me. It wouldn't be good if he did. I made my way out of the house and all I could think about again was Kageyama. I'm going to see him again, he's the only one that makes me feel good and makes me forget about all my problems. I walked and jumped a little while walking to school. I closed my eyes and kept mumbling some song. Until someone roughly took my shoulder. I squeeked.

"Boke. Look where are you going." Voice said. I opened my eyes just to see myself next to the road. I looked behind me to see Kageyama. "And stop squeeking like a goddamn child."
I smiled.
"Okay!! You just took my arm to rough..."
Kageyama rolled his eyes and let go of me.
"Don't judge me if next time I won't stop you then." I looked at him and giggled.
"Okay okay, Bakayama!! Oh.. Thanks btw."
Kageyama looked at me with half eye and turned around. I promise I saw a little blush across his cheeks. I smiled to myself.
"Let's go, stupid" He said.
I nodded and we went to school together. As we walked together, none of us said a word, so I decided to say something.
"Kageyama?" I asked.