It's only him {Kagehina Book}

Chapter 6

𝗞𝗮𝗴𝗲𝘆𝗮𝗺𝗮'𝘀 𝗣𝗼𝘃

I entered the ward. Immediately two brown eyes looked at me. They were different. His eyes looked dull and dead. I felt my chest ache.

As soon as Hinata saw me he immediately turned away from me. I sighed. I started to approach him. Hinata heard my footsteps as he fliched.

"Don't go near." Hinata said quietly. I gulped. I felt my chest ached at Hinata's words.

"Please... I just want to apologize and talk." I said softly.

Hinata looked at me with teary eyes.

"Kage-Kageyama please... Please just go away.." He said and started to cry. I felt so bad.
Hinata hid his face into his palms. There were lot of wires connected to Hinata's nose, and arms. His arms were bandaged. Its all because of me...

I sat next to Hinata. I heard silent sobs comming from him.

"Hinata, please we need to figure things out." At every moment I spend here, I felt more and more guilty.
I reached out for his arm, but he quickly flinched.

"Don't touch me!! Please..." He hugged himself and I saw tears comming from his eyes.

"I'm sorry..." I whispered. Of course it wasn't enough, I need to make up for myself. And I don't even know what should I do to make up for this? None would be enough.

Hinata looked at me, when I apologized.
He didn't said a thing just stared at his bed.

I gently and quickly grabbed his hand before he could flinch. He looked at me with scared eyes, and was about to take his arm away before i pressed his hand to my forehead.

"I'm so sorry... I could never make up for the thing I've done to you." I looked at him and smilled softly. "Hinata, I can't help, but to be worried too. You tried to take your life away. I didn't believe that you were sad or traumatized. But now I do. I really want to know what caused you this sadness. And I... I want to help you... Even though all I did so far, was to put you even to a worse state." I whispered the last word, and I felt something wet on my cheek. Then I realized I have been crying.

After a few minutes of silence, Hinata broke it.

"D-Don't apologize..." He whispered. I looked him into his eyes.

"But It's my fault that you are in the hospital, that you tried to take your life away..." I felt my heart ache at my own words.

Hinata shook his head no.

"Stop ap-apologizing... It's not your fault, Ka-Kageyama..." He whispered and then took his hand away from my forehead.

"Isn't my fault? I literally put you into the hospital, I literally am the worst."

Hinata reached out and wipped my tears away. My eyes widened.

"It's okay... It's not your fault okay? A-And about what have you said to me, I fo-forgive you okay?"

"How..? How can you forgive me?" I whispered. "I can't even forgive myself in the first place." I felt as my eyes got teary again.

"Bakayama, stop it. Its not your fault, just forget about it." Hinata said smilling a little. His skin was still pale.

"Forget? Hinata, look at yourself, your pale, your arms are bandaged and all because of me..." I looked at the ground. Hinata didn't reply. We just sat there in the akward silence. I wanted to say so many things to Hinata, I had so many questions too.

But the worst part is, that I like Hinata. I've said those things, to a person I like?

"Hi-Hinata, can I ask you something?"
Hinata nodded.

"If its not my fault, why did you tried suicide attempt?" I asked.

"I-Its... I have a lot of reasons... I don't feel good talking about it.."

"But I want to know, in case to help you." I confessed.

"You shouldn't help me, its okay."

I decided to leave this topic for a while.

"Hinata, is there... Is there any others things you do to yourself?" I didn't mean to say it, but it just came out from my mouth.

Hinata looked at me with wide eyes.

"I-I don't know... I don't wanna talk about it for a while okay? I will tell you everything later..." I nodded. I'm still glad Hinata trust me. I hope he do.

We just sat there in a silence, before I gently took his hand into mine. Hinata looked at me with a concerned face. I started to fidget with his fingers, then I interwined his fingers with mine. I didn't really think what was I doing when I looked at Hinata. He had a slight blush across his cheeks. It made my heart go all whoosh!!

"Sorry..." I whispered and let go of his hand.

"I-Its.. Okay..." Hinata said under his breath.

We didn't even see how the night came. I was about to stand up, but Hinata grabbed my arm.

"Where are you going?" He asked sounding a little sad.

"Uhm.. Home.."

Hinata didn't reply, just looked at the ground.

"Can... Can you stay with me.. please?" He almost said that in a whisper, so I don't know if I heard him right.

My eyes widened. He wants me to stay with him? If thats what he wants I guess its okay...

"Yea, okay." I said while looking away.

I came closer to him and sat on the bed, trying not to touch any wires or something like that. It was kinda akward at first. I just sat there not knowing what to say. Hinata was laying next to me. After a couple of minutes of just silence, Hinata snuggled his head into my arm.
My eyes widened. I came closer to him and just watched how he snuggled his head into my arm more.
I slowly layed. Hinata snuggled hus head into my chest, while I played with his hair.
"𝐼 𝑤𝑎𝑛𝑡 ℎ𝑖𝑠 𝑡𝑜 𝑓𝑒𝑒𝑙 𝑠𝑎𝑓𝑒 𝑎𝑛𝑑 ℎ𝑎𝑝𝑝𝑦. 𝐼 𝑛𝑒𝑣𝑒𝑟 𝑔𝑜𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑡𝑜 ℎ𝑢𝑟𝑡 ℎ𝑖𝑚 𝑎𝑔𝑎𝑖𝑛 𝑜𝑟 𝑙𝑒𝑡 𝑎𝑛𝑦𝑜𝑛𝑒 𝑑𝑜 𝑖𝑡." I though that to myself and smilled.

𝗔𝘂𝘁𝗵𝗼𝗿: 𝗛𝗲𝘆, 𝗜'𝗺 𝘀𝗼𝗿𝗿𝘆 𝗶𝗳 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗽𝘁𝗲𝗿 𝗶𝘀 𝘀𝗵𝗼𝗿𝘁, 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗻𝗲𝘅𝘁 𝗼𝗻𝗲 𝗶𝘀 𝗴𝗼𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗼 𝗯𝗲 𝗮 𝗹𝗼𝘁 𝗺𝗼𝗿𝗲 𝗹𝗼𝗻𝗴𝗲𝗿.
𝗜 𝗸𝗶𝗻𝗱𝗮 𝗻𝗼𝘁𝗶𝗰𝗲𝗱 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗺𝘆 𝘀𝘁𝗼𝗿𝘆 𝘄𝗲𝗻𝘁 𝘁𝗼 𝗳𝗮𝘀𝘁, 𝗯𝘂𝘁 𝗜 𝘀𝘁𝗶𝗹𝗹 𝗛𝗼𝗽𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗹𝗶𝗸𝗲 𝗶𝘁.
𝗜 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝗯𝗲𝗲𝗻 𝘄𝗿𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗮 𝗹𝗼𝘁 𝗼𝗳 𝗮𝗻𝗴𝘀𝘁, 𝘀𝗼 𝗻𝗼𝘄 𝗶𝘁𝘀 𝗴𝗼𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗼 𝗯𝗲 𝗷𝘂𝘀𝘁 𝗽𝘂𝗿𝗲 𝗳𝗹𝘂𝗳𝗳💓
𝗛𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝗮 𝗴𝗿𝗲𝗮𝘁 𝗱𝗮𝘆:)