the next few months felt euphoric.
honestly i never felt better, the night terrors stopped a while ago, and i genuinely smiled everyday.
sap and will matured alot, they were better people, i could tell. we were all better people than when we first met back in january.
but there was one thing still bothering me, george lost his spark.
he would hardly ever message me, and when he did it was with attitude.
i wasn't sure what i did, or if i had to do with me at all. i couldn't just ignore it, what if something happened to him?
i finally built up the courage to message him and ask what was going on, i wish i never did.
because the response i got will always stick with me.
"i actually think i'm not good enough for you and to be your boyfriend. and idk what's happening to you rn and if you're ok but you didn't talk to me for a few days? even when you were active? made me feel like i did something. maybe it didn't look like that from your perspective but it did from mine, this might sound ridiculous to you and because i gave you another chance because i still loved you like a lot but yeah. but i seriously think this won't work. i still love you and i want you as my friend."
after all this time, i never stopped to think what he was going through, what he was thinking.
i never ever wanted him to feel not good enough for me, or that i was ignoring him.
i thought that maybe if i gave him space, he would feel better. i couldn't be more wrong.
i've only ever wanted the best for him, even if my actions say other wise.
my intentions were always good, but i never stopped to think how they looked to other people.