"If you ever fall in love, do so without reservation, or rather, if you should fall in love simply give no thought to any reservation."
- Vincent van Gogh
Part one of two of "Love Without Hesitation".
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"I feel like this might be my fault," Yelena said aloud in thought. I came over to her side of the counter taking a look over the mess she made with various mixes of ingredients.
"Oh you think?" I retorted, rolling my eyes playfully while she began smirking in amusement at my being 'upset'. Rolling up my sleeves I took the bowl into my hands, beginning to work on fixing what she had done to our batter. Coming behind me, her arms snaked around my waist, her lips pressing soft kisses to the back of my shoulder before she rested her chin in the crook of my neck.
"I just thought if I did more flour, that then there would be more batter for a bigger cake," she explained, shrugging and her arms raising as she hugged my stomach. "Like—a big cake..."
"That's not how the recipe works Lena," I laughed, "if you want a 'big' cake you add more of everything, not just flour."
"My mistake," she defended herself lightheartedly.
Releasing a chuckle I continued on with the batter in my bowl, adjusting the added ingredients as now it was way too doughy and not at all suitable for a cake. I hummed lightly to myself the tune of a simple song, all in all, everything felt right. It was in fact a wonderful, peaceful day.
My mother and sister were gone, meeting with her fiancés family to drop off my sister for a few days, and then my father and brother were out of town for work. Yelena and I had the entire house to ourselves and it was to thank for our visit with my cousin just a few days before. Since leaving his apartment, we have been fine with one another. We'd finally resolved the things she hadn't told me, and I apologized for my behavior.
It didn't take long for either of us to clear the air, especially considering I had heard the basics from my brother the night of the business party. But in our conversation, she explained that yes, she and Natasha were adopted but that didn't make their lives with Melina and Alexei any less real. Their family not being any less of a family unit which had birthed their own children, that they were not faking their identities, only embracing them with their family.
Along with this new truth, she shared that her father does work to do the same as he did with Natasha and Yelena. Being that he smuggles immigrants over the border, using his train cars and purchases of cabbages and lettuce heads to hide people in. He found that in purchasing mass loads of those crops, officers were less likely to search the entirety of the cargo, assuming the car was full of the same vegetable.
He also gave some jobs to man the warehouses which were checkpoints in transferring immigrants from one side of the country to the other. And contrary to what my brother had shared, Mr. Alexei's living was not made off of the backs of the immigrants, but made in the genuine buying and selling of the crops used for his smuggling operation. Meaning his money was never stolen from people, nor was it 'dirty' money.
I felt insurmountably stupid for feeling upset with her in the first place. Not only for being upset for her covering up her real story, but upset for even considering any speculation or rumor my brother held. The stories he would entertain (courtesy of Mary Bonneville), stories which I felt were fake and turned out to be, but also stories which at one point I had a slight thought of possibly being true—Believing them for just a moment.
