Friends With Benefits - P.JM | 18+

12

Izumi.

Izumi was Chuwie's ex-boyfriend.

Funny, he didn't seem like one.

I refused to believe he was one.

In other words, he wasn't emotionally available.

I know, I shouldn't have a say in somebody else's relationship-- but when it causes severe damage that can never be forgotten, I can't help but have an opinion.

I can't help but hold a grudge.

You see, for Chuwie, I could kill, for Chuwie I could give my all, for Chuwie, I could argue, I could do absolutely anything-- it's true when I say it, she's my soulmate.

She's my euphoria.

She's my breath of fresh air.

She's my forever.

I could never forgive anybody that hurts her or harms her.

Chuwie sighed, "I remember--" she pauses, hesitantly.

My hand is placed on top of hers, it was a form of encouragement but also security.

I didn't want her to be hurt.

I wouldn't allow that.

She turns towards me, smiling softly.

She continues speaking.

"--I thought I was in love. I genuinely believed it was love."

She did.

You see, their relationship could be seen as quite funny.

We had a few jokes about it every now and then.

It wasn't that they both liked each other-- he liked her and she was just excited that somebody liked her, she had forgotten what to do and she didn't know how to say no, instead she was constantly screaming,

"Oh my god! Somebody likes me."

Ah, I guess everybody can see where this is going.

She ended up saying she liked him back.

At first, Chuwie made it very obvious she had no liking towards Izumi.

She just liked the idea of somebody being there.

Now, everybody's probably wondering, where did the love come from?

Well, let me explain.

Chuwie broke up with him because he wasn't talking to her, he wasn't communicating, he didn't say how he felt, ever.

He just kept to himself.

You see, sometimes it's fine to be secretive, but when it's to the point that somebody else is suffering, is it really worth it?

Funny, out of everybody, I'm saying that.

I am in no position to speak.

Izumi.

He kept his feelings hidden, all the time.

If he was ever mad or upset at Chuwie, he never said.

Chuwie, tried.

Oh, she tried hard.

However, she never mentioned loving him, she mainly mentioned his mental health-- his depression.

Chuwie speaks, "I only ever thought about his mental health-- I thought that was love. I thought, thinking about his well being and wanting to give him free therapy, was love."

I nod my head, "Yeah-- and that's not your fault. You were worried."

She frowned.

"It's not your fault, either. I hated myself so much-- I just wanted to save him and because I couldn't-- I felt as if I failed my mission or something."

She let out a slight giggle.

You see, that's where we both related, we both just wanted to be all heroic.

We never thought about the impossibilities.

We were young and we were dumb.

"There's more, isn't there?"

Chuwie asks when she notices the frown placed on my face.

I wanted to say it.

However, I didn't.

She already said she was being reminded a lot of Izumi and the next part, was definitely something that would be a remembrance of Izumi.

Her eyebrows raise as she stares at me intensely, "Y/N? Continue. I know there's something more. You can't lie out of this."

Fuck.

I bite down, ny teeth tug at my lower lip, I fiddle with my fingers-- letting out a heavy breath before saying.

"I think-- I think he's not forgotten his ex."

Chuwie frowns, "What makes you say that?"

I slightly lean forward, my hands now on my lap, I stare down at my legs which were hanging off the seat.

"It's obvious. It really is. He talked about his ex. She must've held a great place in his heart, because-"

I feel a heavy lump in my throat, it wasn't going down-- or maybe, it was just not allowing the words to come out further, why?

Maybe, maybe because I myself knew that the words would crush me.

A sob now leaves my chest, the tightening feeling causing my entire body to shake.

It finally came-- everything was washing over me.

Why? why now?

This wasn't how I was reacting earlier.

It shocked me, I felt disgusted.

I felt weak and vulnerable-- I was crying.

Crying over this.

Something so silly.

Chuwie frowns, sitting up and immediately pulling me into her arms.