WE LOST THE SUMMER

11

CHAPTER 11: THE TRAUMA
March 24, 2018
Rionne's POV

After the yesterday's events, i ran away from Summer again, leaving her looking blankly on her spot. What else could I do? I know that I'm catching feelings for her, yet I'm suppressing it.

Out of the blue, my phone rings. I reached for my phone sitting on the kitchen table and answered it after checking the caller's number.

"I heard what happened yesterday." Cara went silent after she said that. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have invited you—" I cutted her off by saying it's fine and it's not her fault, it's not like she can predict the future events. If she can, I won't be in this state where I couldn't love someone again.

"Uhm, Rionne? Can I talk to you in person?" Of course, I said yes, I don't have anything to do anyway.

Cara ended the call after telling me the location where we will meet later.

I checked the time and saw it's currently 10:48 a.m. so, I stand up from the stool I've been sitting on since I woke up and decided to take a shower.

I was too lazy so, I ended up wearing simple clothes. When I arrived at our meeting place, I quickly sent a message to Cara, informing her of my arrival.

In a minute, I received a reply from Cara that she's waiting for me at the coast. Apparently, the location she sent me isn't that far from my place and it's also nice that she picked the beach as I'm considering going here at some point. I opened the door of my car and jogs to where Cara is.

But instead of seeing Cara there, I saw Summer. Her eyes are swollen, like she has been crying overnight.

"H-hey, are you alright, Summer?" As if a cue, I immediately stepped closer to her and gripped her both shoulders. But, she shook her head and cried louder.

Her state is worrying me. She's crying nonstop and not answering my questions. I don't know what to do, so I did the only thing I know to comfort her, and that is by hugging her.

But, the next thing she did surprised me. She pushed me away and glared at me with her bloodshot eyes while her tears are sliding down her cheeks continuously.

"Why are you doing this to me, Rionne?" What did I do? I want to understand why she's like this, so I reached for her, but Summer stepped back before I could do so. "No! Don't touch me and don't come near me!" Her eyes. They are full of pain.

I want to wipe her tears, know the reason why she's being like this, but how can I do that if she don't want me close to her?

"Please, tell me what's wrong, Summer." I can't help, but to feel worried. She's breaking down in front of me and I don't know the reason.

"It's you! You kissed me then the next thing you did is leave. I bet, you're having fun with this damn game of yours!" Then here comes silence. I'm speechless, I don't know what to say or react. Well, it does seems like I'm toying her. I'll let her think of it that way, then.

"Woah! So, you're running away again?!" I paused and closes my eyes before facing her again.

"You brought this to yourself, remember? You gave me the consent to kiss you." At that moment, I regretted saying it. I just added more pain on her plate.

"I like you, Rionne." I frozed on my spot. I blinked and gulped hard, not knowing what to do at the sudden confession. When the silence got too much to bear, Summer slumped down on the sand, letting out sobs and whimpers that are painful to witness and hear.

"I want to love you, Summer. But, I'm still too broken to love you." Summer stopped from her actions for a second to look at me and comprehend what I said.

"Then, let me fix you, Rionne." I closed my eyes and shakes my head. I can't let Summer inside my fucked up world. I don't want to use her to fix me. What if on the process of fixing me, she'll end up breaking her own world because of how complicated I am? We will just hurt each other and I don't want to hurt her.

Who am I joking? Look what you're doing right now, Rionne. She's already hurting because of you.

"No, Summer. My past is still haunting me." The wound that Hailey left was too deep that couldn't be healed by a simple words of comfort or even a bandaid. No matter how hard I try to forget it, it keeps on coming back and I'll be back to zero again. I even tried to drown myself, just to escape this misery, but I can't find a way out.

Suddenly, I can't breathe because scenes from that night flashes in my mind. The way Hailey's fingers unbuttoned that old man's clothes, her fake giggles while that asshole is above her, their disgusting make outs, and everything I witnessed that night.

Summer seems to notice as she nears me. She's saying something, but I can't hear her. I can see that she's screaming and her tears are racing down from her eyes to her cheeks.

She looks scared, so I put my right hand on her left cheek and softly caresses it using my thumb.

When I can finally hear her I decided to tell her everything.

"Hailey cheated on me with my father." Summer gasped and her eyes are wide while her right hand is covering her mouth. I looked away and bit my lower lip to hold back my tears.

"The night I caught her sleeping with my father was on my birthday." I shook my head and buried my fist on the sand. "It's too vivid in my head, that's why I couldn't forget it." Summer cupped my two cheeks then, hugged me. Didn't know, her warmth is enough to calm the wild waves inside me.

"You don't have to continue, Rionne. Because now, I understand you. So, please hold my hand and let me help you." No, I won't allow you to fix me, Summer.

"I'm sorry, Summer. But, I promise I'll hold your hands the day I'm completely healed." I smiled genuinely at her and before escaping her arms, I subtly left a chaste kiss on her lips.

Wait for me, Summer.

𖧧 ───━
WE LOST THE SUMMER
by @mydahlia_