Courageous(Can i love again?)

Chapter 45

Keira's POV

"And he was the reason why I started to hate all men.. including you" I continued. He looked at me and I can't read his emotions. I shrug and continue.

"I think that's the reason too why Uncle Victor never introduced you to me before. He knows what happen and how I suffer so much because of that psycho" I said while nodding. He nods and smile a little and he was like thinking about something, then he suddenly spoke.

"Maybe my dad did not introduced you to me, but I think I saw you before" He said with a smile I frown and confused.

"How can you say that?" I asks.

"My dad once let me to come with him. I didn't know at first that he was going to a hospital but I just go with it. He never lets me inside a particular room, I was just outside waiting for him" He said then continued.

"But out of curiosity I open the door a little bit and then I saw you laying on the bed, having a weak smile, pale skin with a pink bonnet on your head" He said I turn to his side and was surprised. I do have a pink bonnet when I became bald. He laugh a little.

"Honestly, I kinda have a crush on you the first time I saw you. Even if you are suffering you still have the strength to smile and to laugh, I admire you from afar" He said then he looked at me. He has a crush on me?

"My dad never told me your name. Every time I ask he's just telling me that you are his friends daughter, that's it. I never knew who you really are, I saw your parents before but I didn't know that they are the friends my dad was telling me that's why I never thought that you could be that girl. I never got the chance to know everything because after that day when I came with dad I left to study abroad with Manang Sabel accompanying me" He continue, I am just listening to him.

"I tried to find you when I graduated college. But my dad has a lot of friends that had a daughter so I gave up, because I thought the girl I saw was already.. dead?" He said unsure, I frown at him and he saw that. I wanted to be happy when he said that he tried to find me. But when he said that he thought I was dead I became sad and angry a little.

"Don't get me wrong, when I saw you laying on that bed I thought you really are going to.. I'm sorry" He said in a sad voice. I sigh and smile.

"It's fine. I think the same way before, that's why I stopped looking in the mirror" I said with a laugh.

"I do look really bad while fighting for my life" I said looking away.

A moment of silence passed when he spoke to break it.

"So after many years, did you enter in a relationship?" He ask I looked at him and rolled my eyes.

"You're not listening, are you?" I said raising my eyebrow. He laughs.

"Of course I am. I understand and remembered everything. I just want to break the silence" He said still laughing, I shake my head and laugh too.

"Okay, I'll continue" I said.

"I am single for seven years and have no any intentions of entering into a relationship at all, because I told myself after what happened that I don't need a man to make me happy, I don't need a man to accompany me or to love me. Because I can do that to myself and I have Kate and my parents. Until you enter the picture" I said he looked at me and just listening.

"I really don't mind getting married to someone I don't know. And when I found out that Uncle Victor's company needed my help I didn't take a second thought to help" I said he smiled at me so did I. He was about to say something but I spoke again.

"I don't like you at all King" I said a little shy he became sad.

"My hate towards you became worst when I saw you in your office doing-- you know" I said shrugging, he avoided looking at me maybe because he was ashame about it. I sigh and look at the sky then continue.

"But I was the one who told you to continue doing that, it's also written in our agreement. You really are a big jerk for me and a shameless one King" I said with a bit laughing. I can't look at him. But I can feel that he was staring at me.

"I hate you so much, I don't know why should I hate you for doing that. We don't have anything between us, but when I saw you doing that I felt the feeling of betrayal again that I once felt with Ryan" I said and a tear immediately fall in my face. I sniff.

"Maybe because you are my fiancé that time and I know what I said I know what I wrote in our agreement, but can't you just consider not doing it because you already have... me?" I said then I look at him still crying, I found him staring at me too with tears in his eyes.

We looked in each others eyes then after a while I shake my head and laugh while wiping my tears away.

"But it's all in the past. It already happen we can't undo it" I said still a bit laughing just to feel a little better. Then suddenly I was surprised when he touched my face caressing it while wiping my tears away, I'm just looking at him then he spoke.

"I'm sorry Keira" He started.

"I know what I did back then was wrong I know it. I know how a big jerk I am, I can't undo anything I've already done. But I can do the right thing now, I can change for you Keira" He said again, my heart was beating so fast my breathing became heavy. I don't know what to feel.

"I was not like this before, I just started to became like that when my dad passed away. I want to divert my mind and I chose to ruin every girl that wants me in their bed. I used them as my past time and my toy whenever I'm bored. I know it's not right, but I can go back to who I really am Keira.. for you, I can do that for you" He said still caressing my face, I hold his hand that was on my face and I smile.

"That jerk, that's not me. But the boy you've been with on the island that was the real me. And this, this man you're looking at this is the real me" He said then he put his head on my forehead and spoke again.

"I want us to work. I want this marriage to work. I need you Keira. I don't know when and how I started to feel something weird towards you. But I can't take this anymore that's why I followed you here because I'm planning to make you fall in love with me" He pull away a little then look me in the eye. He's making me cry more. I'm feeling so many emotions.

"You will not gonna believe this but, I already fall in love with you Keira. I don't know where I get this confidence to confess my feelings to you. But here I am saying that.." He paused and look at me dearly.

"I love you Keira, I really do" He said with a smile while tears are still falling form his eyes. I smiled and still crying.

"You are so kind, you're helping so many people, you're working very hard for your family and for all the people who depends on you. I want to help you, just give me a chance to prove it to you. Give me a chance to love you. Give us a chance Keira, let's try this relationship. I want you, I need you and I love you Keira" This is overwhelming I don't even know what to say. Is he for real? Is this real? Am I dreaming? Did he just tell that he loves me for so many times? What should I say?

"I-- I-"